Just saying the word hospital gives me the wiggins. I have been poked and prodded and operated on so many times and even though it has been awhile since my last surgery, walking through those doors brings me right back. It's like a time warp. In a matter of seconds, I am right back in that backless gown, ass hanging out, IV in arm and butterflies in my stomach. Every worse case scenario flashing through my mind. Know what's worse than your average garden variety hospital?? A super duper ghetto Oakland hospital!! I went with Taryn and Joel the day that Miss Taryn had her back surgery and let me tell you, that hospital was somethin' else. I won't tell the whole story, but I will give you a snippet to chew on.
We arrive at the hospital, which is located in a less than savory part of town. Admitting is done and we are taken to a room for pre-op. Actually, I wouldn't call it a room. I will call it a "slightly larger than a crack house bathroom, but not as clean as one" type of room. First thing I notice..carpet. Why the fuck would you have carpet in a hospital? My thoughts are immediately drawn to every virus, bacteria and pathogen we have talked about in poop class and how that lovely indoor/outdoor carpet would house them just swimmingly. Secondly, the chair that poor Taryn has to sit on is all kinds of busted. First off, it looks like it was from a dentist's office. From the 50's. Secondly, it is broken. Every time she moves it makes the horrible noise and shakes, like it is just going to fall to pieces right there. What's worse is that it did it while the nurse was in there and she just dismissed it. Now, i'm not a nurse, nor am I a medical professional in any sense, but the bitch knew Taryn was in there for back surgery. Would it have been to much for her fat ass (and she was a biggun folks, and red to boot. she did not look healthy, but I digress) to say "hey, this poor girl is in for back surgery, so that MUST mean that her back is fucked up and she may quite possibly be uncomfortable and me, being a nurse and in a profession to fucking help people, I think it would be a good idea to get this girl and nice, non-broken chair." Yeah that must have been too much for her 500 plus pound self to comprehend. She just went on asking her questions and writing her notes. The second thing I notice about this stellar, top of the line room is the garbage can. Now, it's just a regular garbage can, which is problem numero uno. It is also badly in need of emptying. Not only is it a regular, non covered garbage can that is in need of emptying, it is fucking so full that it is overflowing!!! There is IV tubing hanging out of it and touching the floor! Again, not in the medical industry, but one assumes that said IV has been used. I mean, why would they throw away a new, non-used sterile IV hmmmmm??? Virus, bacteria and pathogen's oh my! By now, I am trying to keep myself calm and not go absolutely ape-shit postal for Taryn's sake. In addition, I am also ignoring the impulse to grab her and take her to a beter a better hospital, say a big "fuck you" to Kaiser and pay for the surgery myself : ) So then nurse Fatty Mc Fatterson takes Taryn's temperature. She is sitting off to the side of the jacked-up chair. When she is done, she then proceeds to hold the thermometer up and clicks the button to release the sterile cap (fuck, at least they used one of those, on must be thankful for small favors!!!) which she then sends the used...and I stress the word USED, cap flying towards to the overflowing garbage, banks it off the wall (of the wall. off the fucking wall people!) and into the trash. Being that I am such an astute person, I can only assume that this room has been used before. Call it intuition or chalk it up my incredible investigative skills, but that garbage didn't get full on it's own!! I am so beside myself and in shock that she did this, all I can think to say is "nice shot". So many health violations there, so little time.
In the end, the operation was a success and Taryn is safely home, where I know for a fact, it's a sterile environment : ) All I could really ask for is that she is safe,healthy, and well, straightened out. I know she is safe and healthy. The straightened out part will happen in time, hopefully. All comedy aside, I hope she ends up good as new. Nobody likes to see the people they love in pain, ya know?
That's about it for today. It's noon and I am still in my jammies. I need to shower, eat, clean and study. Not necessarily in that order.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
My wicked smart brother
I love my big brother. I really really do. Big bro Chris came over yesterday to help Leland and I study. I wasn't looking forward to it at first cuz I was up late and was a bit hungover, but we needed to do it, so we did. We had been given 2 new math formula's for our poop class that were crazy. Chris explained everything and gave us problem's to work out. Then he would check our answers. Here is an example of the crazyness that is the math for class.
So you have these trickling filters in a plant, which is the beginning of the biological part of treating wastewater. What you have to find out is the organic loading in pounds BOD/day/thousand cubic feet for a circular trickling filter. BOD is the Biochemical Oxygen Demand. What you first have to figure is the specs. The diameter of the filter is 133 feet squared with a media depth of 6 feet, the primary effluent flow is 2.5 MGD (millions of gallons per day) with a BOD of 200 mg/L. First you multiply the 2.5 MGD x the 200 mg/L BOD x the weight of water (which is 8.34) write that number down- then you multiply the diameter squared x .785 x the depth (6ft), then you divide that number by 1000. Draw a line under the first number you wrote down and write your second number down. The top number represents the amount of BOD and the bottom number represents the volume of media. Now you divide the volume of media by the amount of BOD and you are left with 50lbs /day/thous.cubic feet. There ya go. Throughly confused? That is the shit (no pun intended. wait a minute, maybe there is a pun intended. puns are fucking funny) that I am dealing with folks. The above formula is something that I will have to figure out during the operator test multiple times. I actually have to memorize the above formula and so far, 4 others like it. This is something that my little Erin brain is going to have to nail. It's daunting, really, but my brother is such a huge help that I think I will be ok. Just have to study and not get flustered. It's also a huge plus going through this with Leland. We study together every week and it's awesome to have someone who is going through the same frustrations and worries. Also, Dave and Larry are great. Chris has been doing this for 10 years, but to talk to him, you get the feeling that he has been doing it his whole life. It is just so natural for him. I have always been proud of my brother. Back when he was serving in the army there was a dangerous mission to Panama where his company was featured on the news as the first guys jumping in. The LA Riots when he was in the Guard. Now, an Operator 5 for a huge wastewater plant. I guess I am just in awe of him. Wicked smart, I tell ya.
That's all I gots for today. Still jobless, but hopefully I will have an interview this week. Taryn gets her back surgery tomorrow, so if everyone could think good thoughts for her, that would be awesome.
Be well everyone : )
So you have these trickling filters in a plant, which is the beginning of the biological part of treating wastewater. What you have to find out is the organic loading in pounds BOD/day/thousand cubic feet for a circular trickling filter. BOD is the Biochemical Oxygen Demand. What you first have to figure is the specs. The diameter of the filter is 133 feet squared with a media depth of 6 feet, the primary effluent flow is 2.5 MGD (millions of gallons per day) with a BOD of 200 mg/L. First you multiply the 2.5 MGD x the 200 mg/L BOD x the weight of water (which is 8.34) write that number down- then you multiply the diameter squared x .785 x the depth (6ft), then you divide that number by 1000. Draw a line under the first number you wrote down and write your second number down. The top number represents the amount of BOD and the bottom number represents the volume of media. Now you divide the volume of media by the amount of BOD and you are left with 50lbs /day/thous.cubic feet. There ya go. Throughly confused? That is the shit (no pun intended. wait a minute, maybe there is a pun intended. puns are fucking funny) that I am dealing with folks. The above formula is something that I will have to figure out during the operator test multiple times. I actually have to memorize the above formula and so far, 4 others like it. This is something that my little Erin brain is going to have to nail. It's daunting, really, but my brother is such a huge help that I think I will be ok. Just have to study and not get flustered. It's also a huge plus going through this with Leland. We study together every week and it's awesome to have someone who is going through the same frustrations and worries. Also, Dave and Larry are great. Chris has been doing this for 10 years, but to talk to him, you get the feeling that he has been doing it his whole life. It is just so natural for him. I have always been proud of my brother. Back when he was serving in the army there was a dangerous mission to Panama where his company was featured on the news as the first guys jumping in. The LA Riots when he was in the Guard. Now, an Operator 5 for a huge wastewater plant. I guess I am just in awe of him. Wicked smart, I tell ya.
That's all I gots for today. Still jobless, but hopefully I will have an interview this week. Taryn gets her back surgery tomorrow, so if everyone could think good thoughts for her, that would be awesome.
Be well everyone : )
Friday, February 22, 2008
Oh god
Oh my fucking god people. I just called the tech support gig and told them I am not taking the job.
Rick's recruiter friend couldn't get me an interview until next Wednesday, which posed a slight problem being that I was supposed to start on Monday. I decided that I would rather take a chance on the office job. I am freaking out, but in a good way. I feel like I am finally taking control of my situation. Rick told me it was a decision I had to make on my own, no advice was he going to give.
At first, I was irritated. He always gives me advice. He is my own personal tabernacle of recruiting and job knowledge. How could he leaving me hanging out on that proverbial limb by myself??
After shaking off the cobwebs of sleep, mucho cups of coffee and much thinking, I came to the decision on my own and it feels pretty good. There is no guarantee that this construction/office job will work out, it's just an interview, but I feel like I am moving in the right direction.
That's about all I have right now : )
Rick's recruiter friend couldn't get me an interview until next Wednesday, which posed a slight problem being that I was supposed to start on Monday. I decided that I would rather take a chance on the office job. I am freaking out, but in a good way. I feel like I am finally taking control of my situation. Rick told me it was a decision I had to make on my own, no advice was he going to give.
At first, I was irritated. He always gives me advice. He is my own personal tabernacle of recruiting and job knowledge. How could he leaving me hanging out on that proverbial limb by myself??
After shaking off the cobwebs of sleep, mucho cups of coffee and much thinking, I came to the decision on my own and it feels pretty good. There is no guarantee that this construction/office job will work out, it's just an interview, but I feel like I am moving in the right direction.
That's about all I have right now : )
Thursday, February 21, 2008
In a mood
I am in a mood today kids and I fear that it is not a good one. For one thing, I am freezing my ass off. Why am I freezing my ass off you ask? Cuz my stupid self is sitting outside, smoking and blogging. I was going to blog inside, where it is toasty, but I really wanted to smoke..so here I am.
You should see me, sweatshirt with hood on and tied tightly around my neck, pj bottoms tucked into rain boots. It honestly doesn't get any sexier. My rain boots are wicked cute though, so I guess I have that going for me. The weather reports say we are going to get a smack down storm this weekend. Sweet. Love those rainstorms. We just haven't had enough rain this year. I think we need it, so I shouldn't be bitching, but I am in a bitching kinda mood. I also feel it necessary to bitch about my breakfast. Oatmeal. I cooked it perfectly but put too much brown sugar in it and now my stomach hurts. Also, I didn't drink enough coffee this morning. I was going to make another pot, but I always make coffee before class and I really don't need to be caffeinated for 13 hours straight. I also don't have anything for lunch and I really don't want to go get something. What I need to do is shower and go to the store. A hot shower sounds nice right now.
I guess what is adding to my bad mood is my current job situation. I am really regretting my descision to take this job. To add insult to injury, a recruiter friend of Rick's has called with another job option that sounds way better. My only quandary is that I am supposed to start my new gig on Monday. The recruiter is trying to get me an interview with this construction company in Marin tomorrow. It's an office job, which sounds kinda cool. Rick says that I need to wait till after the interview (if she can get me one) to see if it sounds like a lock. He is right about that. He is the recruiting smartypants after all. It just sucks that I have found something that I think I can be good at (the wastewater poopy job) and now it's a waiting game. In addition to waiting, it's also not a guarantee that I will get hired. I need to finish the class and take the test. Then, I have to see if I get hired and that can take a long time. I need to have a job while all that is going on and I just don't feel like the tech support gig is where I should be. Rick says that I always do a major freak out before I take a new job, but this just feels different. Not so much a freak out as it is just plain foreboding. A sense of doom if you will. I'm not nervous or stressed about it, just blah.
I am also irritated that with all this time off, not once have I even attempted to exercise. It has not even crossed my mind, which is wicked lame. I guess the force is strong with my couch and laptop. Unfortunately, as happy as the couch makes me, it sure hasn't helped with my squishy ass. Thankfully, I haven't been eating bad so I have not been gaining weight. I have stayed at my current pre-laid off fatness. Not any fatter, but not any thinner.
Methinks it is time for that shower now.
You should see me, sweatshirt with hood on and tied tightly around my neck, pj bottoms tucked into rain boots. It honestly doesn't get any sexier. My rain boots are wicked cute though, so I guess I have that going for me. The weather reports say we are going to get a smack down storm this weekend. Sweet. Love those rainstorms. We just haven't had enough rain this year. I think we need it, so I shouldn't be bitching, but I am in a bitching kinda mood. I also feel it necessary to bitch about my breakfast. Oatmeal. I cooked it perfectly but put too much brown sugar in it and now my stomach hurts. Also, I didn't drink enough coffee this morning. I was going to make another pot, but I always make coffee before class and I really don't need to be caffeinated for 13 hours straight. I also don't have anything for lunch and I really don't want to go get something. What I need to do is shower and go to the store. A hot shower sounds nice right now.
I guess what is adding to my bad mood is my current job situation. I am really regretting my descision to take this job. To add insult to injury, a recruiter friend of Rick's has called with another job option that sounds way better. My only quandary is that I am supposed to start my new gig on Monday. The recruiter is trying to get me an interview with this construction company in Marin tomorrow. It's an office job, which sounds kinda cool. Rick says that I need to wait till after the interview (if she can get me one) to see if it sounds like a lock. He is right about that. He is the recruiting smartypants after all. It just sucks that I have found something that I think I can be good at (the wastewater poopy job) and now it's a waiting game. In addition to waiting, it's also not a guarantee that I will get hired. I need to finish the class and take the test. Then, I have to see if I get hired and that can take a long time. I need to have a job while all that is going on and I just don't feel like the tech support gig is where I should be. Rick says that I always do a major freak out before I take a new job, but this just feels different. Not so much a freak out as it is just plain foreboding. A sense of doom if you will. I'm not nervous or stressed about it, just blah.
I am also irritated that with all this time off, not once have I even attempted to exercise. It has not even crossed my mind, which is wicked lame. I guess the force is strong with my couch and laptop. Unfortunately, as happy as the couch makes me, it sure hasn't helped with my squishy ass. Thankfully, I haven't been eating bad so I have not been gaining weight. I have stayed at my current pre-laid off fatness. Not any fatter, but not any thinner.
Methinks it is time for that shower now.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Back to Reality
Vegas is fabulous. In fact, it's better than fabulous. There just isn't an adjective that quite describes Vegas properly. We had a really great time. We got to Vegas Friday night, late. We decided to stay at our hotel, find a bar and maybe play some poker. We found a bar in one of the restaurants. We sit down, feed the poker machines and start chatting up the bartender. This lady is amazing. She is a total throwback. She has been a bartender all her life, all over the country. We pegged her age at mid 60's, but just looking at her, you could tell that she was a bombshell in her day. We are talking a beauty that you just don't encounter every day. She just had a look about her. She loved us. She said that we were the first nice people she has had in awhile. She hooked us up all weekend. We also went and saw a Cirque Du Soleil at the MGM, called KA. It was fucking phenomenal. Visually gorgeous. I wont go into it, cuz whatever I say is not going to do it any justice. KA was really the only plans we had . We kinda just wanted to fly by the seat of our pants. We went and gambled everywhere. I have a newfound love for Roulette. Fuck, I just love gambling in general. I usually prefer Blackjack, but the tables were SO packed. We hunkered down at Harrah's and found a Roulette table that we liked. The dealers were awesome. We also played Blackjack at O'sheas. I guess you can say that we spent most of our gambling time at the older, slightly sleazier places. I find that the dealers and the people are just more enjoyable. Dude, O'sheas has beer pong people. Sure the casino smells slightly of puke, but beer pong, hello!!!! There needs to be a group trip to Vegas so we can play beer pong.
It is looking like my days of being unemployed are seriously numbered. I got offered and took the tech support job for the winery software. I am not so enthused. It's not that I don't want to work. I like to work. I have been enjoying my times as unemployed house bitch, though. I just dont want to do customer service. I am really enjoying my poop class and really want to move forward with that. The only problem is that there is no guarantee that I will get a job in that field and being that it is a county job, it could take months to find one. I guess I should look at this current job as just something to do until the poop thing matriculates. I think I am a wee bit depressed about taking it. It just doesn't feel right. *sigh*
It is looking like my days of being unemployed are seriously numbered. I got offered and took the tech support job for the winery software. I am not so enthused. It's not that I don't want to work. I like to work. I have been enjoying my times as unemployed house bitch, though. I just dont want to do customer service. I am really enjoying my poop class and really want to move forward with that. The only problem is that there is no guarantee that I will get a job in that field and being that it is a county job, it could take months to find one. I guess I should look at this current job as just something to do until the poop thing matriculates. I think I am a wee bit depressed about taking it. It just doesn't feel right. *sigh*
Friday, February 15, 2008
VIVA LAS VEGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nuff 'said. See y'all back here on Tuesday. Well, that is if I haven't caused any serious brain damage from all the drinking and smoking and gambling I plan on doing : )
Thursday, February 14, 2008
un-fucking-believeable
dude. I had to write about this. First off, I have no idea how anorexics can make themselves throw up. Really, it's disgusting and ridiculously hard to do. Plus, there is a lot of slobber involved. Why you ask? Get ready, this is a good one.
So, I'm in bed and my stomach starts a'rumblin'. I get up and decide that I want pancakes. I make up the batter, get my homemade syrup out of the fridge so it can warm up and turn the griddle on. So far so good. I am super excited to be having pancakes. I make 2 gloriously huge cakes, nice and fluffy. I butter them up, grab the syrup and my cup of coffee, head to the couch to finish Notting Hill and eat my utterly delightful breakfast. About half way through, I spear a square of pancake and notice something weird. There is a greenish slime on the square!!! Now, there was nothing green about the batter. The milk and eggs were fresh. When mixing it up I noticed nothing out of the ordinary. So I freak out. Completely. I go to the kitchen and look in the batter. No floaters of anything alien. I take out my syrup container and notice in the top, there looks like a bit of what I saw on the pancake, but I can't tell. The syrup isnt even old. I mean, for fuck sakes, all it is sugar, water and maple extract!! More freaking out. Now I am thinking that I have ingested some crazy bacteria/pathogen that is going to kill me. I run to the bathroom and spend the next 10 minutes with my finger down my throat, trying to make myself throw up. I need to get the pancakes out! Well, without trying to make y'all barf, I managed to get some of it out, but I know there are still some partially digested pancakes in my belly. So I say this. Consider it a public service announcement if you will, should I end up in the hospital poisoned by some unknown alien slime. I have put a sample of the slime and pancake in the fridge. As is the syrup container. I want to keep it in case it is needed for testing to determine what medical action needs to be taken. Pay attention folks, you could be accomplices to saving my life : ) I blame my new found germ phobia on my poop class. What if it is some crazy mutant sugar based algae that is lethal??? God, I hope I don't get some kind of food poisoning. ok. I am a fruitcake and might be overreacting a bit. Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, I am hungry again.
UPDATE!!!
Ok, it has been 3 hours since the Revenge of the Green Slime. No projectile vomiting, no dizziness or fever, no stomach cramps, I'm not growing a new head and there are no signs of gangrene. I think it might be safe to say that I did not ingest the mysterious slime. I just polished off a sammich from Port O' Subs and it seems to be sitting in my stomach well. I am currently having a ciggarette and that seems to be going ok as well. Don't think I am throwing that sample away though. It is still in the fridge. I will post an update before I leave for class. That is, if I am alive and well and not praying to the porcelain gods
UPDATE #2!!
I am back from class. No exorcist reenactments. No explosive diarrhea. Nada. I am thinking that I must have avoided eating the slime, somehow..I have no clue. I was hoovering those fucking pancakes. Why I chose to look down right as the gook covered confection was hanging off my fork...I will never know : )
So, I'm in bed and my stomach starts a'rumblin'. I get up and decide that I want pancakes. I make up the batter, get my homemade syrup out of the fridge so it can warm up and turn the griddle on. So far so good. I am super excited to be having pancakes. I make 2 gloriously huge cakes, nice and fluffy. I butter them up, grab the syrup and my cup of coffee, head to the couch to finish Notting Hill and eat my utterly delightful breakfast. About half way through, I spear a square of pancake and notice something weird. There is a greenish slime on the square!!! Now, there was nothing green about the batter. The milk and eggs were fresh. When mixing it up I noticed nothing out of the ordinary. So I freak out. Completely. I go to the kitchen and look in the batter. No floaters of anything alien. I take out my syrup container and notice in the top, there looks like a bit of what I saw on the pancake, but I can't tell. The syrup isnt even old. I mean, for fuck sakes, all it is sugar, water and maple extract!! More freaking out. Now I am thinking that I have ingested some crazy bacteria/pathogen that is going to kill me. I run to the bathroom and spend the next 10 minutes with my finger down my throat, trying to make myself throw up. I need to get the pancakes out! Well, without trying to make y'all barf, I managed to get some of it out, but I know there are still some partially digested pancakes in my belly. So I say this. Consider it a public service announcement if you will, should I end up in the hospital poisoned by some unknown alien slime. I have put a sample of the slime and pancake in the fridge. As is the syrup container. I want to keep it in case it is needed for testing to determine what medical action needs to be taken. Pay attention folks, you could be accomplices to saving my life : ) I blame my new found germ phobia on my poop class. What if it is some crazy mutant sugar based algae that is lethal??? God, I hope I don't get some kind of food poisoning. ok. I am a fruitcake and might be overreacting a bit. Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, I am hungry again.
UPDATE!!!
Ok, it has been 3 hours since the Revenge of the Green Slime. No projectile vomiting, no dizziness or fever, no stomach cramps, I'm not growing a new head and there are no signs of gangrene. I think it might be safe to say that I did not ingest the mysterious slime. I just polished off a sammich from Port O' Subs and it seems to be sitting in my stomach well. I am currently having a ciggarette and that seems to be going ok as well. Don't think I am throwing that sample away though. It is still in the fridge. I will post an update before I leave for class. That is, if I am alive and well and not praying to the porcelain gods
UPDATE #2!!
I am back from class. No exorcist reenactments. No explosive diarrhea. Nada. I am thinking that I must have avoided eating the slime, somehow..I have no clue. I was hoovering those fucking pancakes. Why I chose to look down right as the gook covered confection was hanging off my fork...I will never know : )
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