Wednesday, September 17, 2008

What do I do? Help!

Panic, table for 1 please!
So, the tech support gig offered me the job yesterday and for quite a bit more than they offered back in Febuary. I haven't heard from the poop plant about the internship (though, I have emailed twice) and I am currently sitting at my receptionist job, that I like a lot.
What do I do? Do I take the good paying job, on the chance that I might never break into the wastewater industry?? Do I rest on my laurels (sidebar- what the fuck is up with that stupid expression and why the hell did I just use it??) here at my little paying job and hope to still score an internship and just buckle down finance-wise? Maybe I get a different second job (ditch the winery gig, since there have been no hours from there) that pays ok and maybe that would balance out?
Anyways, totally freaking the fuck out over here. Not sure what to do, where to go. My brain is going in 5 million different directions and I can't even being to settle on a decision.

Monday, September 15, 2008

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!

Queue the creepy Poltergeist music....which makes me kinda sad to think about cuz didn't that poor little blond girl die during the 3rd one? Cardiac Arrest or something yucky. Poor thing, anyways.. here I am. Remember that whole "I'm not going to let my blog go stagnant and I am going to nurture it and blah blah blah? Yeah, I didn't really do that. My apologies. I'm back and I am back with a vengeance. Lots of stuff on my mind today, so sit back and get ready for the verbal vomit!
Doesn't life have a way of just suddenly popping up and smacking you in the face? I lie, I was actually thinking that life has a way of just all of the sudden smacking you in the nuts, but then again, thankfully I do not have nuts so really I couldn't tell you how it feels if life sucker-punches you in them. I would imagine it hurts bunches. Anyways, you get my point. Your sitting there, all comfortable in your pitiful role of languishing and bitter housewife then all of the sudden..BAM! Hello! I am life and I just cold-cocked ya.
7 months I was unemployed. I was bored and miserable and not much fun to be around. DOn't say I wasn't cuz near the end, I was even pissing myself off! Now, I have too much on my plate and I am starting to want to rip my eyelashes out ( I would have said hair, but eyelashes seemed way more painful).
Job #1- I am employed by a nice little family winery to completely reorganize their wine club and make them a bit more organized and functional. The pay is decent, I work from home (which is wicked weird and not very structured) and's a job. Bumbling idiot's come to mind, but at least they are nice an leave me to my own devices. There is something to be said for being your own boss. It's fucking lovely. The ability to work in various stages of dress and with a cat on my lap is also a huge plus.
Job #2- I work from 6:30AM to 12:30PM Monday through Thursday as a receptionist at a place called Fit 'N' Furry. It's a dog/cat and critter boarding, grooming and daycare facility. Though I preform all the duties of a receptionist, I get to play with all the dogs in doggie daycare and cuddle the kitties that are boarding. The pay is awful, but I am nice and happy there. The animals are awesome and I like all my co-workers. Let me reitterate, the pay is terrible. Seriously, I haven't made this little since I worked for minimum wage back when I was 15. I enjoy it though and sometimes that's just a tad more important than the money. Though, I don't know how long I can stick it out making that little, but damn it if I don't work with the cutest bunch of animals ever!! I do enjoy all the creatures.In fact, I like them more than I like most humans. After 17 years of solid customer service, there is a bit of my sanity coming back and just the faintest glimmer of contentment.
Class- I am taking a Tennis class on Monday and Wednesday evenings and I LOVE it. Good excersise and it is rekindling a love that I have harbored for a long time. I forgot how much I loved playing and I never realized how much I missed it.
Internship- I have applied for an internship at a local poop plant. I went for an interview last week and I think I would be a really good fit there. The only thing I am waiting on to see if THEY think I am a good fit for them and if they could work around my wonky-ass schedule. This internship will be taking place around my dog-job hours and all day on Friday, which is my day off. I WANT IT BADLY. It will give me the experience (on paper) that I need to get an Operator-in-Training gig. Maybe they will look past the fact that I have boobs (albeit great ones) and say "hey, she has already worked in a plant and for FREE no less!!! Let's hire her!!"

Now, enter Life and the painfull flogging. I got headhunted. Seriously no fooling! Someone actually called me and said "hey! we liked you way back when and we want you to give us another shot". Should feel good right? The ego should be preening a bit, yes? Yeah, NO. Remember way back in February when I got an offer for a tech support gig for winery software and I turned them down? Well, they called me last week and wanted to know if I would be interested in coming in for another interview. There had been some "restructuring" of the company and they wanted to see if I would be at all interested again. Well, curiosity and guilt (guilt because I make no money) got the better of me and I went in last Friday. The interview went uncomfortably well. I should hear from them this week.
Why now? Wasn't I just an unemployed lame-ass for the last 7 months? Why does all this shit have to go down now? I wish I would have known that poop plants have internships (maybe something my professor could have mentiontioned????) and I would have applied WAY earlier! Why did that company keep my resume, even though I turned them down? Why does the one job I love pay so little? Why why why? Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. This blows.
Now I am in a total quandry. If I get offered the tech support gig, then I will be making good pre-lay off money and it will be 1 stable Monday thru Friday job. I can be a run-of-the-mill worker bee in a job that I am ho-hum about until a job comes up in a wastewater plant. Done. No crazy schedule. No back and forth between 2 jobs. Nice paycheck every other week that allows us to have our cushion back in our checking account.
The other scenario: I stick it out with the bad paying jobs, all the while hopefully working in my internship to gain experience in the ONE industry that I want to be in. The lack of money will force us to SERIOUSLY tighten our belts and be miserable and then we will have to eat Ramen. Lots and lots of Ramen. Now, I enjoy those salty little noodles as much as the next guy, but fuck, that is just bleak. I guess it all hinges on the fated internship. If I get it, it only makes sense to take it and deal with the Ramen and lack of social happenings. If I don't, then it is on to the sensible well paying job, that is IF they offer it too me. Sigh, sigh and a triple, super pathetic siiiiiiiiiggggggggghhhhhhhhhh.

On a happier note: The boys have almost completed their rail car and the Regatta is in 2 weeks. For those who have no clue what I am talking about, go to the weldedsykkellen blog link that's posted on the right. The 4 boys include my husband and 3 of our dear friends. They have spent many many hours building and creating this car and they have almost finished. I am SO proud of them for sticking it out : )

What else? Gee, I think the 5 million paragraphs above pretty much cover it. I could add a couple flowery little things and other fun happenings that have been going on, but I gotta get to Tennis class. BTW-sidebar-My ass is looking great and I can FINALLY zip up boots that go to the knee AND, I am down 2 pants sizes. Woo-hoo! Sorry, I had to give myself a shout-out. It's just with all of the walking, hiking, tennis and trying to eat right, I am finally seeing results and it's the first time in a looooooooooong time that I have actually been comfortable in my skin. Yay!

I bid you all adios.