Holy flying fuckballs!!

Ok. So I realize that the vulgar language is not needed, but there is a good reason for it- I swear!

I passed, people, I really passed. For realies. I PASSED MY WASTEWATER TEST!!!!!!!!!!

I can't say much more, as I am to relieved and way too flippin' excited.

Money trumps Happiness

Really? It does?
Yup, sure does. Bring on those greenbacks!
Happiness is important, yo. Don't be an idiot. Money can't trump happiness ever!
Yeah well, money is important too. Don't you have expensive taste in make-up?
Make-up makes me happy, therefore it does not matter what it costs.
okay, how the holy hell are you going to buy the make-up without any money, you incredibly dense fucknut?

This internal monologue brought to you by the House of Insanity-AKA- The brain of Erin

So there you have it. My decision was made. I am foregoing happiness for a chance to earn more money. I'm not really stoked on the tech support position at all, but I understand that in these dark economic times, I am lucky to get offered such a plump-paying position. I have made peace with my decision, I have, but every morning at my doggie job, I am reminded why I enjoy working there so much. I spent 15+ minutes sitting with a kitty, while he head-bumped me and licked my nose. I sat on the floor of a kennel (room) with a crazy pug, just playing and cuddling. Dog slobber, cat hair and really cool people = a really fun place to work. I am extremely sad to see it slip away. I try to remain cavalier about it, when I am there."no big deal, I will see you guys if you ever call me in." but I am super bummed. Even bummed enough to call my mood melancholy. Melodramatic, maybe, but I only have 2 days left and I really really really don't want it to end.
Enter in another fab tidbit. I take my Waste Water Operator 1 test on Saturday. I have been cracking the books like crazy. I have been quickly reminded that even though my class ended in June, I should have continued to study at least a little bit each month. I feel like I am in quicksand. I can't remember anything from my class. I am going over all this stuff my buddy put together for me (thank god he did. Without his help I would be up the proverbial creek without a fuckin' paddle) and I am lost. Am I panicking because I am nervous? Probably. What if I fail? The ones that have taken it say I will pass, but what if I don't? How big of a failure will I be!?!! Oh my god, I will be SO embarrassed if I don't pass. I should have studied more. I should have started hitting it a long time ago. I just figured that it would be better to study the week before so it would be fresh in my brain. Yeah, look at me. Writing in my fucking blog because the studying is making me want to throw up. I swear, I am my own worst fucking enemy. I am lazy and I make stupid decisions.
Sometimes I just want to kick myself in the head. Why do I make everything so difficult for myself? Any normal person would say, "hey! you do that because you like to be challenged. A struggle invigorates you!" Yeah, no. I don't like it, yet problem after problem comes up and I consistently make it messy. Now I've gone and riled myself up.
Anyhoo, back to the books.....

What do I do? Help!

Panic, table for 1 please!
So, the tech support gig offered me the job yesterday and for quite a bit more than they offered back in Febuary. I haven't heard from the poop plant about the internship (though, I have emailed twice) and I am currently sitting at my receptionist job, that I like a lot.
What do I do? Do I take the good paying job, on the chance that I might never break into the wastewater industry?? Do I rest on my laurels (sidebar- what the fuck is up with that stupid expression and why the hell did I just use it??) here at my little paying job and hope to still score an internship and just buckle down finance-wise? Maybe I get a different second job (ditch the winery gig, since there have been no hours from there) that pays ok and maybe that would balance out?
Anyways, totally freaking the fuck out over here. Not sure what to do, where to go. My brain is going in 5 million different directions and I can't even being to settle on a decision.

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!

Queue the creepy Poltergeist music....which makes me kinda sad to think about cuz didn't that poor little blond girl die during the 3rd one? Cardiac Arrest or something yucky. Poor thing, anyways.. here I am. Remember that whole "I'm not going to let my blog go stagnant and I am going to nurture it and blah blah blah? Yeah, I didn't really do that. My apologies. I'm back and I am back with a vengeance. Lots of stuff on my mind today, so sit back and get ready for the verbal vomit!
Doesn't life have a way of just suddenly popping up and smacking you in the face? I lie, I was actually thinking that life has a way of just all of the sudden smacking you in the nuts, but then again, thankfully I do not have nuts so really I couldn't tell you how it feels if life sucker-punches you in them. I would imagine it hurts bunches. Anyways, you get my point. Your sitting there, all comfortable in your pitiful role of languishing and bitter housewife then all of the sudden..BAM! Hello! I am life and I just cold-cocked ya.
7 months I was unemployed. I was bored and miserable and not much fun to be around. DOn't say I wasn't cuz near the end, I was even pissing myself off! Now, I have too much on my plate and I am starting to want to rip my eyelashes out ( I would have said hair, but eyelashes seemed way more painful).
Job #1- I am employed by a nice little family winery to completely reorganize their wine club and make them a bit more organized and functional. The pay is decent, I work from home (which is wicked weird and not very structured) and well...it's a job. Bumbling idiot's come to mind, but at least they are nice an leave me to my own devices. There is something to be said for being your own boss. It's fucking lovely. The ability to work in various stages of dress and with a cat on my lap is also a huge plus.
Job #2- I work from 6:30AM to 12:30PM Monday through Thursday as a receptionist at a place called Fit 'N' Furry. It's a dog/cat and critter boarding, grooming and daycare facility. Though I preform all the duties of a receptionist, I get to play with all the dogs in doggie daycare and cuddle the kitties that are boarding. The pay is awful, but I am nice and happy there. The animals are awesome and I like all my co-workers. Let me reitterate, the pay is terrible. Seriously, I haven't made this little since I worked for minimum wage back when I was 15. I enjoy it though and sometimes that's just a tad more important than the money. Though, I don't know how long I can stick it out making that little, but damn it if I don't work with the cutest bunch of animals ever!! I do enjoy all the creatures.In fact, I like them more than I like most humans. After 17 years of solid customer service, there is a bit of my sanity coming back and just the faintest glimmer of contentment.
Class- I am taking a Tennis class on Monday and Wednesday evenings and I LOVE it. Good excersise and it is rekindling a love that I have harbored for a long time. I forgot how much I loved playing and I never realized how much I missed it.
Internship- I have applied for an internship at a local poop plant. I went for an interview last week and I think I would be a really good fit there. The only thing I am waiting on to see if THEY think I am a good fit for them and if they could work around my wonky-ass schedule. This internship will be taking place around my dog-job hours and all day on Friday, which is my day off. I WANT IT BADLY. It will give me the experience (on paper) that I need to get an Operator-in-Training gig. Maybe they will look past the fact that I have boobs (albeit great ones) and say "hey, she has already worked in a plant and for FREE no less!!! Let's hire her!!"

Now, enter Life and the painfull flogging. I got headhunted. Seriously no fooling! Someone actually called me and said "hey! we liked you way back when and we want you to give us another shot". Should feel good right? The ego should be preening a bit, yes? Yeah, NO. Remember way back in February when I got an offer for a tech support gig for winery software and I turned them down? Well, they called me last week and wanted to know if I would be interested in coming in for another interview. There had been some "restructuring" of the company and they wanted to see if I would be at all interested again. Well, curiosity and guilt (guilt because I make no money) got the better of me and I went in last Friday. The interview went uncomfortably well. I should hear from them this week.
Why now? Wasn't I just an unemployed lame-ass for the last 7 months? Why does all this shit have to go down now? I wish I would have known that poop plants have internships (maybe something my professor could have mentiontioned????) and I would have applied WAY earlier! Why did that company keep my resume, even though I turned them down? Why does the one job I love pay so little? Why why why? Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. This blows.
Now I am in a total quandry. If I get offered the tech support gig, then I will be making good pre-lay off money and it will be 1 stable Monday thru Friday job. I can be a run-of-the-mill worker bee in a job that I am ho-hum about until a job comes up in a wastewater plant. Done. No crazy schedule. No back and forth between 2 jobs. Nice paycheck every other week that allows us to have our cushion back in our checking account.
The other scenario: I stick it out with the bad paying jobs, all the while hopefully working in my internship to gain experience in the ONE industry that I want to be in. The lack of money will force us to SERIOUSLY tighten our belts and be miserable and then we will have to eat Ramen. Lots and lots of Ramen. Now, I enjoy those salty little noodles as much as the next guy, but fuck, that is just bleak. I guess it all hinges on the fated internship. If I get it, it only makes sense to take it and deal with the Ramen and lack of social happenings. If I don't, then it is on to the sensible well paying job, that is IF they offer it too me. Sigh, sigh and a triple, super pathetic siiiiiiiiiggggggggghhhhhhhhhh.

On a happier note: The boys have almost completed their rail car and the Regatta is in 2 weeks. For those who have no clue what I am talking about, go to the weldedsykkellen blog link that's posted on the right. The 4 boys include my husband and 3 of our dear friends. They have spent many many hours building and creating this car and they have almost finished. I am SO proud of them for sticking it out : )

What else? Gee, I think the 5 million paragraphs above pretty much cover it. I could add a couple flowery little things and other fun happenings that have been going on, but I gotta get to Tennis class. BTW-sidebar-My ass is looking great and I can FINALLY zip up boots that go to the knee AND, I am down 2 pants sizes. Woo-hoo! Sorry, I had to give myself a shout-out. It's just with all of the walking, hiking, tennis and trying to eat right, I am finally seeing results and it's the first time in a looooooooooong time that I have actually been comfortable in my skin. Yay!

I bid you all adios.

XOXOXO

To all who read my mindless ramblings, bitchings and musings:

I love and appreciate all of you SOOOOOOOOOOOO much.

Please tell at least 2 people how much you love them today! (I'm not sayin' you have to stick to 2. If you wanna tell everyone you love them, that is cool with me!)

I know, strange post. I am feeling very Hallmark cardy right now.

Grrrrrrr

Why is it that people say they will call you by the end of the week and never do? Why can't they just say, "we will let you know"? By saying they will call me by the end of the week, I naturally assume that, hey, I will get a call by Friday. Here it is, 3:13PM on Friday and my phone ain't ringing. I'm not desperate, but me sitting around the house staring at my fucking phone and waiting for that call makes me feel like I am. It makes me feel week and stupid and, blech...desperate. I hate that. Oh well, it's still early...maybe he will call and say " Erin, we would absolutely LOVE for you to come work with us as a technician. You are exactly what we have been looking for." Maybe....

Sidebar: why the fuckity fuck can I never spell technician right? I always spell it technition. Secondly: when I spell it wrong, why does technician NEVER come up in the dictionary options? Frustrating...this is me being all frustrated and whatnot.

updates and such

You know when something is new and you can't stop doing it cuz it's fun and exciting and different and well...new? Then, that something becomes old and mundane and a constant reminder of all the time you have and they fact that you don't have a job and that you suck...do you know that feeling?
Well, that's how I feel about my computer. In the beginning, it was fun to sit outside for hours and plug away at my laptop, write on my blog and chill. Now, I just kinda stare at it with disdain. But that doesn't mean I should cease to write right? There's so many witty pundits and critisisms out there, all waiting to be put in my blog. I admit it, I let my little blog go stagnant. Like a plant not being watered, my words were all dried up and bitter. The problem was that I just didn't have anything of any value to say. Nothing funny, nothing witty, nothing even angry. I am here to say that I am back, ready to write. Ready to bring you back into the world of Erin, as crazy and rambunctious as that may be.

The most recent thing of note is a job interview I had today. It was a tech/driver gig for a coffee company. For all you office people out there: You know those coffee services in your breakroom that always work and never cease to run out of coffee? Well, I interviewed for a position to be the person that fixes those machines when they break and bring you all the coffee your office can handle. Also, installing new machines for new customers. I was super excited about it for 3 reasons. #1: I could continue to deliver excellent customer service while not being chained to a desk and be more "hands-on". #2: the job would teach me light plumbing, a skill worth it's weight in gold and which would transfer over nicely to a wastewater gig. #3: I love coffee and working with it would be cool. The guy liked me. I answered all the questions extraordinarily. I looked great, but not too great cuz I didn't want him to think I was way too girly for the position. Translation: I left the heels at home, wore a nice pair of khaki pants with my best mary-jane docs and a cute cardigan with a nice camisole that showed off my...assets nicely cuz quite frankly, a good pair of boobs only helps things along right? Right. The employment add asked for someone with a mechanical mind (I got's that) and someone with good customer service skills (I gots that in spades) and also that there was no experience necessary and that they would train. Sweet, it's a win-win. I gots this gig in the bag. And it would seem so. The guy even said that he wished he didn't have any more interviews and that he really like me! Here is the only caveat, and methinks it's a big one. He asked me if I would be interested in "Sales". Sales, huh. Say with me folks..."Sales". For those that know and love me, they know that I would rather lose my big toe than to do "sales". There really is no reason to keep putting "sales" in quotes, I just think it makes it look more ominous..so don't get all grammatical on me ; ) Why would it I be interested in "sales"?? Did I apply for a "sales" position? No. I sure didn't. Oh yeah, I'm a girl, so naturally I should be interested in "sales". How fucking sexist is that? I don't want a "sales" job. I want the tech job. I nicely reiterated that I was really more interested in the tech position. He said that he just wanted me to think about it, just in case he interviews and hires another applicant that has more mechanical experience. Which I get, I really do, but FUCK. Also, he said that I would have to pass a drug test. I said "that's fine, I have no problem with that". Then, this is where a bit of the sexist thing comes in again...He also said that should I be offered the tech position, that I would have to pass a physical. One that makes sure that I can manage all the "heavy lifting". Let me just say that the sentance prior to him telling me that little nugget was "Most of our machines weigh 20lbs and there is one that is too heavy to lift on your own, regardless of how strong you are, so anyone would need help lifting that". So, a question enters my brain..is he thinking that I am going to have a problem lifting 20lbs?? Do I look like a delicate fucking flower? I told him that I had no beef with the lifting and in fact I am stronger than I look. I went on (because at this point I needed him to know that just because I have a vagina instead of a penis, I can do manual labor and I felt I had to prove myself, shit...I digress...) anyways, I went on to say that when I worked at the winery that I regularly lifted cases upon cases of wine and champagne and that I could carry 2 cases of bubbly, each weighing 48-52lbs each, with ease. That seemed to drive my point home and he went on to tell me how much he liked me. Yay, point Erin. I just don't get it. I would never assume that because of ones gender, they could only do certain jobs. Hey, there are jobs I gladly leave to the boys. The dudes on Discovery's "Deadliest Catch" is one. Another is a prison guard. Not at a county jail, but at a maximum security deal. Even then, I don't begrudge a girl the opportunity to do those jobs at all. Go for it. I guess I am just frustrated. I think the frustration stems from the fact that it is proving super hard to get into the wastewater field, and I know it's because I am a girl. It's cool though. I will take my operators test in October and I will pass. I will keep plugging along, hoping that some Plant manager takes a chance on me. Who am I fucking kidding... I am hoping I apply at a time that they have to filll their State required "girl quota" and I will gladly take advantage of my "weaker sex" then : )

So there you go. Erin as of 3:02pm, July 14th. 4 cigarette's in and a little bit lighter due to walking 3+ miles a day. I could catch you all up on the mindless day-to-day crap that has taken place since my last post, but I don't wanna. I will say though that my neighborhood went OFF on the 4th of July. Hell, the neighborhood behind us lit up the sky like a war-zone. It was awesome!

Bye for now friends. I will try to post more here on out. Promise : )

Yay for California!

Today's post is not about me, for a change. No complaining about boredom or joblessness. No whining about my poop class (which is over and I got a B!! woo-hoo!!!) or the fact that I am sitting outside with no smokes. ok, that was about me a little bit...but NO MORE!!!!

Today is about a decision made by the Supreme Court of CA back in May. A decision that goes into effect at 5:00pm this wonderfully balmy afternoon. The state has finally lifted the ban on same-sex marriages! At 5:00, every same-sex marriage that takes place will be legal. No more "commitment" ceremonies. Now they can get married and possibly fuck it all up just like the rest of us hetero's!!

In times where global warming is a constant reminder that we need to take care of the planet and the never ending wars and violence are a constant reminder that we need to take care of each other, it thrills me that I live in a state that has let this happen.

California, with all your wacky liberals and crazy laws and earthquakes and traffic and ridiculous housing prices....I have never loved you more and I have never been prouder.

madness with a side of lazy please

It's been awhile, my dears. It must mean that things have been so exciting and my days have been so jammed packed with goings on that I just haven't had time to blog right? Riiiiight. I wish I could say that. I've been lazy and quite frankly, the laptop has been bothering me as of late. It's like a reminder that I have way too much time on my hands. I open it up, check my email and some gossip and job sites, then shut it down. Let's see, it's 1:00 in the afternoon and I am still in my PJ's. I've had way to much coffee and not enough to eat. I have no desire to do anything today. The only appointment I had this week, I totally forgot about. It was yesterday. Lame lame lame. Days are really bleeding together now. I need to get a calender. One that I can write shit down on. My memory for dates is sucking.
I'm still unemployed, which is cool. Well, not cool cool, but the kinda cool that comes with accepting that there are things that have to come in time and that I have to be patient for. I have come to terms with it. I could get a job tomorrow if that was what was necessary. I am simply waiting for the right gig to come along. How many people have that opportunity right? It's a luxury that I am lucky to have. I need to just not be so hard on myself. The jobs that I haven't gotten, well..I have to believe there is a reason for that. They weren't right for me and would have kept me from a job that I really want to do. I have embraced the extra time and will run with it.
I spent Friday, Saturday and Sunday drunk off my ass. That's always fun. What for, you ask? My oldest nephew, Jimmy, graduated High School. I can't believe that the little boy that used to beg me to take him to Burger King and would sing "whomp, there it is" on cue when he was 2 is 18 and graduated. He is such an awesome kid. Love him to death and I couldn't be prouder of the young man he has turned into. Anyways, my sister in laws family from West Virginia was in town and there was lots of partying to be done. We were over there every night, making sure that the beer that my bro brews was up to par ; ) Good time's, I tell ya.

Not much else to write about. I could sit here and squeeze out topic after topic, but I don't want to force it. It's bad enough it's been so long since I have sat down and wrote. Besides, I am out of smokes. I'm sitting outside on a beautiful summer day and I can't even smoke. That is just irritating : )

whoa- where was I when summer happened?

Yes, the news said there was going to be a heat wave, but there is something slightly wrong about it being 83 degrees at 8:30 AM. Seriously, I am outside having a smoke and a cup of coffee and it is already way too hot. Did I wake up in Arizona or something?

Update: It is currently 99 degrees. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck, it's hotter n' hades out right now.

A damn near perfect day....UNTIL

I was having a great day. A day that I may even go so far to say that it was grand.
I started off the morning with a good night's sleep. Waking up to a cup of coffee at eye level and a kitty by my side. I dress and have a cigarette with Rick before he is off to work. Tangent, why the fuck can I NEVER spell cigarette right? I have been smoking those goddamn things for the past..well, lets just say lot's of years and I never get the spelling right. Sheesh. Anyways, back to my good day. After the smoke, I sit down with my pop and finish up watching Transformers, which we had started the night before. He had never seen it. A complete travesty in my humble opinion. So we are watching said movie and sipping on coffee, Hannah the ankle biter nested between us. Side note: I cherish every minute with my daddy. They happen ever so briefly and I love every minute of it. Back again to story (I will try to stay on point..heehee). Transformers is done, I shower and bid adieu to dad. Hannah and I hang out and we go to the market for stuff. She falls asleep in the car on the way home (super duper triple bonus to my good day. LOVE it when she falls asleep!) and I unload the car. 15 minutes into the unloading process, Dusty comes over. He hangs while I put the groceries away and Candace picks up Hannah. Dusty and I are then on our way to play some golf. YAY!! I have someone to play with!!!! We go play 18 holes on a great course and have an absolute blast. I played really well. We chatted, drank beers, smoked and smacked some golf balls around. The sun was shining and it was nice and warm. Perfection right? Even the noxious fumes from the dead thing have abated a bit. I feed the cats and sit down to check email and putt around on the net till I have to make dinner. Mind you, 4 beers on the course have given me a slight buzz. I am downright joyful at this point. What's that sound? Oh, I have 2 voicemails. Dang, didn't even hear it ring. Ok. Checking VM's. First message, my hairdresser telling me he can get me in earlier than my previously allotted time..YAY! Woo-hoo!! Things are fantastic!!!! 2nd message: the lady at the staffing agency about the Wine Club position.... "Hi Erin, it's so and so from Nelson, I'm calling regarding the Wine Club position at St. Francis. Well, they actually decided to go with another candidate. Please give me a call in the morning to talk." Enter in exploding noise, cuz that's exactly what my good mood did. It fucking crashed and burned. What? Did I hear that right? They decided on ANOTHER candidate? You mean they found someone who had more than 5 years wine club experience and 17 years customer service experience? What the fucking holy fucking fuck-fuck????? Are you fucking kidding me? Really, they found someone better suited huh? I am SO fucking pissed off right now. If I didn't have to make dinner, I would be pouring myself the biggest fucking vodka collins this world has ever seen. I was a goddamn shoe-in. A shoe-in!!!!! I knew that chick had a bug up her ass about me being a wine club manager. Like I was going to go after her fucking job. Please, honey..have enough confidence in yourself to not be intimidated by my fucking experience. Can't you see that I would be a fucking asset to your operation? I do not want to even be in the wine industry anymore. I was more than happy to settle in to that gig for the 6 months temp that they wanted.
Fuck it all. I am making that fucking Vodka Collins.

mindless ramblings

My house is currently being invaded my ugly black spiders with red butts. No, not black widows, but still ugly and much hairier. I have seen 4 outside in the last hour. I must blame the douchebags that planted all these fucking pine trees in our backyard 30 years ago. Though they do provide some nice needed privacy, they house about 5 million different species of bugs and I am not terribly thrilled about it.

Day 7 of "dead thing, please mummify already" is not going well. The dead smell had morphed into a pungent fishy odor, mixed with rotting whatever. Not cute in the least. I couldn't even stand in the bathroom and put on my make up. It is nasty with a capital N.

I interviewed with a winery last week, for a wine club job and have yet to hear anything. She said she had 1 more interview to do and would get back to me soon. I was a fucking shoe-in. I think she was worried that I would try and take her job. She wanted to make sure that I was comfortable with an associate position. I thought I made it plain that I did not want to be a manager and that I would more than pleased with being a regular ol' wine club worker. Whatev. I'm getting tired of this job searching thing. I tested for the Meter Reading position, but haven't heard back from that yet either. That one's gonna be slim anyways. They had 250 people testing for one position. And lets just put the final nail in the coffin for that construction gig from way back when. I haven't heard from that recruiter in weeks. *sigh*.

I turn 33 next week. Not terribly stoked about that.

The upside for today? Rick and I met with our wedding photographer and FINALLY put together our wedding album and ordered some enlargements. Only took us close to 3 years.
We get our shit in 6 weeks. Another cool thingis that since we waited so long, we now get our negatives back. I am going to pu together albums for the family and get some pics together for the wedding party. If they want them, that is. Rick thinks that since we took so long, that nobody is going to want our wedding pictures. I say fuck it, we will give them to 'em anyways : )

That's all I gots.

decomp: part tres

Day 3- dead thing is in full throes of decomposition. In fact, methinks that whatever has died has possibly multiplied. Smell is now creeping into the living room. How long does it take a rat, mouse, possum and/or raccoon to mummify? Why do I feel like the killer in Disturbia, who stuffed his victim's in the walls? or John Wayne Gacy, but I think he buried them in the crawl space under his house. Who knows, dead thing(s) might possibly be under the house and not in the walls. Seriously, it smells bad. If Rick and I weren't such weenies about it, we would have searched and destroyed already, but neither of us want to do it. Where is the mighty killer that is Taryn when we need her? She would TOTALLY do it. She killed a potato bug with a house key, Rick and I standing behind her, screaming like little girls. That takes mad skills yo.
On side-note: there is some serious birdie shenanigan's going on in my backyard. I just looked out the window and I was welcomed to the site of blue jay butt hanging upside down on one of my planters. Then I noticed another one standing in the other planter, right side up. The acrobatic birdie was pulling at the moss-like substrate that lines the planters. Little bastard shredded it up right proper, I tell ya. The fat little brown birds that stick to the ground were out too, but the blue jay's were running them off. My god, it's a birdie turf war.

Foul odor, part deaux

Rick has proposed 2 solutions to the foul and mysterious odor. #1- If I find it, he will remove it and
#2- wait it out, deal with the smell and eventually whatever is dead will mummify. So far, I am leaning towards option #2. The whole "me find it" thing just grosses me out. I am not looking in holes with a flashlight, waiting to stumble upon some dead thing. Just thinking about it gives me the serious wiggins. I opt for plan #2, which is still wicked gross. Hi, we are going to wait until something completely decomposes then it wont smell anymore la dee da. It sounds so serial-killeresque.

A foul and mysterious odor

Monday sweeps by without any fanfare. After a busy weekend, Monday is just kinda there. Me, in my PJ's, no shower and nothing to do. My niece comes, sleeps for 2.5 hours, then goes and I am left again, alone, with nothing to do. I am sitting on my couch, emailing back and forth with Rick, who is not feeling well. Low and behold, in he walks. In addition to scaring the shit out of me (it was 1:00 in the afternoon) he is not feeling well. Something has upset the inner workings of the Ricker. Without the gory details, he uses the bathroom and goes directly to bed. After I bring him some soup, nature has called and I use the bathroom. First thing I notice is the smell. "jeez babe, we have a fan and room spray for a reason." I shrug it off to whatever is going on in his bowels and commence my day of laying on the couch and watching movies. Time progresses and I walk back to the bedroom to check up on the sicky. The same smell from hours before hits me again. "Goddamn, what the fuck is that? It shouldn't still smell should it??" Rick says that he thinks something is dead. At first I laugh, thinking he is making a funny about bombing the commode, but then realize that he is serious. My mind drifts back to when Rick's dad had trapped rats in their garage. The traps were set high, so unfortunately you don't know you have killed something till the smell happens. The smell in the bathroom is very similar to that of the garage. I open the cabinet to the sink, no smell. Thank god I didn't kill something by throwing my hair dryer around in there. Uh oh, has something died in the wall? Maybe it will go away. Which leads us to this morning. The laundry room is on the other side of the bathroom and there is a hole in the wall where the cats hold vigil once in awhile. Probably rats or mice hanging out , causing a ruckus. As I was doing laundry this morning, the foul and mysterious odor was ever so present. Well that's just dandy. The laundry room AND the bathroom smells. So what does one do when one thinks something has expired in their wall? Must contact carpenter friends asap. Those handy boys will know what to do. Visions of ripped up walls and dead disease-bearing vermin dance in my head. Bleech. To make matters worse, I have to take a shower. My lazy ass couldn't motivate to take one yesterday and before my own stink starts assaulting my nostrils, this girl needs to bathe. Problem: I don't want to shower in the stinky room. Warmth and steam is gonna make it worse right? The whole house is going to be foul. Great, here I am, stuck in this house cuz there is not a goddamn thing I need to do and now I'm going to be marinating in the smell. I am lame. Unless I want to go outside and spray myself down with the garden hose, I just need to do it. I must be brave.

annoyed, frustrated and beyond bored

Yep, that's me. All of the fucking above.
I am so NOT in a good mood today. The sun is out and it's nice and warm which is not adding to my mood. It's pretty bad when you want the weather to match your mood. Beyond that, the one task I have been given is to mow the lawns. I have mowed the back lawn once and that was under the supervision of Rick. He gave me instruction on how to turn the fucker on, but I am not so confident.
At least it's something to do right? Right? Jeez, someone shoot me now and put me out of my misery. I feel like an old cow that the farmer has put out to pasture. Random analogy, I know. I am beyond frustrated that I can't find a job. I have applied to some asinine jobs. Which reminds me that I really enjoy the word asinine. Not only for it's meaning, but because it has "ass" in the title and that makes me giggle. Anyways, back to today's does of bitching. It's pretty bad when I can't even score a waitressing gig. I even got halfway through an online application for Costco, before I abandoned that idea. How stupid can I be to even consider going back there???? I was there for almost 11 years for christsakes!! Seriously, I almost finished it and clicked apply. The joblessness is starting to effect my brain. I think with every minute of TV I watch I am getting stupider. Dang, I didn't think stupider was an actual word. I fully expected the squiggly red line to appear under it and then the part of me that likes to use proper grammar would have re-typed "more stupid".
What the fuck. This is a total garbage post. I don't know who exactly reads my blog but seriously, take my advice. If you regularly read it, take a break from it. The post's as of late (and i expect the future ones) are and will continue to be crap. I have nothing witty or funny to say anymore. The witty and funny are gone. I am defeated and cranky.

Edit: side-note for all you smokers out there: does anyone else get a slightly giddy feeling when opening a brand new pack of cigarettes? Maybe it's just me.

*sigh*

For 6 hours I poured everything I had into that mid-term. I brought it over to my brother to look over. I compared answers with Leland. In the end, I was super proud of the work I put into it.
ALL FOR A FUCKING B. Not a b+, but a FUCKING B.

I know my kids a star...WTF?

Yep. I have hit an all time low. Not yet rock bottom, but loooooooooooooooooow. You know that part of the ocean where it is SO deep that all the things that live there are totally white cuz there is no sun? Yep, that low. That's me. So low in fact, that even as I write this, I am giggling at the lowness.
I have been getting up with Rick every day, so I won't fall into the trap of sleeping in. Why? Should I ever find a fucking job and I have to wake up early, it won't totally fuck me up. I know, I'm smart. Anyways, I have a routine. Open eye's at 7am. Rick brings me coffee and puts in it on the nightstand then he gets into the shower. At about 7:30, I am awake enough to grab coffee and watch the morning news. Rick and I have a smoke before he leaves (no smoking in the car) and then I am left to my own devices. I make myself breakfast, turn on the tube and the laptap and nestle into the couch to look for a job and watch some TV. Cool right? Usually I stick around the movie channels. I have never said I have the best taste in movies or TV programming as I tend to like some pretty lame shit. There are no good movies on, which sucks, so I surf. I settle upon VH1, where there is a half hour of "never seen footage" of the Rock of Love show. Sweet, I'm on it. By the way, before you think I am a couch potato, I usually just have the TV on in the background while I am on the computer. The ROL show is over and I am reading Perez Hilton, so I just leave VH1 on. The show that comes on next is something that even I, Erin, lover of all that is teeny bopper movies and all kinds of "reality" shows, appalls me. It is called "I know my kids a Star". Basically its all these mom's and their precocious little pre-teens living in a house trying to make their kid the next child star. To add insult to injury, Danny Bonaduce is the host. This show is terrible. These mom's are absolutely nuts. This one mom actually looks like she belongs on the Rock of Love show. Big ol' fake boobies and donkey Veneers. They had to take face shots of their kids and the kids had to audition for a sneaker commercial, complete with a choreographer. I just can't even explain how bad this show is. If your kid is the next child star, I think you just know, right? Why can't you let your kid be a kid? Rick's ma used to take him and his brother out for modeling and acting gigs. They had head shots and everything. They were both great and they did lots of commercials and adds, but there came a point where they didn't want to do it anymore and they stopped. She didn't push them, she didn't keep them in it longer than they wanted. That's a good stage mom. Why can't these mom's do that? If there kid has that "it" factor, then it will come out naturally. Instead they push and push and exploit the shit out of them to get what they want. It's just sad. What's even more sad? I wasted an hour watching this piece of shit programming. Hence, the new all time low : )
Nothing else new to report here. I applied for 2 jobs this week. One was at an animal sanctuary where disabled kitty's are rescued and live out their days. The other one was a waitress at a local card room. Crazy, I know, but the tip's might be nice and I love me some poker.
The days are getting warmer and the hills are nice and green again. We are looking at 80 degrees and higher for the next couple of days.
I have my class tonight. Let's keep our fingers crossed that we get our mid term grades!
Ta Ta for now.

Fuming and smoldering, all at the same time

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. Fuckity FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
There, only slightly vulgar, but exactly what I am feeling right now. If you read yesterday's entry, then you will know that I had my poop class last night and was anticipating getting my grade on my evil, satanic, time sucking, idiotically written mid-term. Yeah, I guess that was to much to fucking ask. Leland and I head to class (sans Dave and Larry, they chose to take the night off). We get there, no teach. We go outside and smoke, still no teach. We go back into class and the few people that are there are milling about, chatting and whatnot. Now it is 10 after 7 and we are starting to think that teach is a no show. SWEET! Now Leland and I can go to a bar (which is what we wanted to do anyways, but went to class simply hoping that we would get our test's back). Then in walks this librarian looking guy, complete with a sweater vest (which was Pink, I might add) and a jaunty little driving cap sitting atop his noggin. WTF? This dude is SO not our teacher. He apologizes for being late, said he couldn't find the class and could we please stop chatting and commence with the class. A little back story, our professor (not really a professer at all, but I am tired of using the word teacher) has guest teachers come in for certain topics. Now, on to our tale. Out comes my syllabus, which is completely fucked up cuz dipshit got the dates for spring break wrong. I gather that this is going to be the dude to talk about Disenfection, which was what was scheduled for last week (we didn't have class cuz it was spring break, back to the syllabus screw up). So I ask.."you don't by any chance have our test's do ya?", Whereupon he says no and commenced with the lecture. And lecture he did folks. From 7:10 to 8:30, when he graciously let us out for a merciful 10 minute break, then from 8:40 straight thru to 10:00pm.
Now, as mixed up as our teach is, we always get a twenty minute break and he never goes till 10. Pink sweater vest was a fucking machine. Nice enough guy, but DAYUM, homeboy love him a little Disenfection talk. Anyways, I am super pissed that we didn't get our tests back. I really really really want to know how I did. Shit, it sucked away 6 hours of my life and all I want is my grade. *sigh* what a pisser.
On the upside (I am trying to always add an upside now, my lame attempt to be a bit more positive), Rick let me have THE car today. I went and get her all washed and cleaned up. She looks so pretty now.
I'm off to work on a birthday present for a party I am attending tomorrow. I gotta reign all my creative juices in and knuckle down. Time for a good movie on in the background and a nice cold Miller Highlife.

Pretty days and nobody to play with

One of the many sucky things about being unemployed is the fact that none of my friends can come out and play with me. Here I am, sitting in my backyard on a beautiful spring day, smoking and drinking a Diet Dr. Pepper. Blogging, of course, for sheer lack of nothing better to do. My errands are done, I have studied for class tonight and the Washer and Dryer are plugging away. There is a pile of ironing to do, but I am putting that off due to the overwhelming injury occurrences. Why I can't get through ironing without burning myself, I will never know.
Searched all job sites? Check. Perez Hilton, DListed and TMZ surfed? Check. Stupid movie of the day watched? Check check. Today's cinematic masterpiece was To Die For, with Nicole Kidman playing a crazy ass weather girl and the delightfully talented (and hot, even with a mullet) Joaquin Phoenix playing her 16 year old lover who axes her husband. Stupid Stupid Stupid. Not a good movie at all. I guess it is slightly better my movie adventures on Monday, and by slightly, I only mean it was better cuz it was a movie I hadn't seen before. The play list on Monday was The Hills Have Eyes (the 2006 version, blech. Bloody as hell, there is a dog murder and the actors sucked), Disturbia (for the 1000th time..can't get enough of that cute little bastard Shia) and The Blair Witch Project (I enjoy this movie and like to have it on in the background if I am doing something else). *sigh* I am lame. Even worse, and I can't believe I am going to share this with you, is that when I give in to the pile of shirts that is in need of pressing, I will put in my favorite ironing movie, Transformers. Again with the Shia addiction. The things that surface when you have nothing but time eh?
I do not believe I mentioned that I do have a bit of a job on Monday's, Wednesday's and Friday's did I? From 8:15 to 12:15, I watch the little ankle biter that is my niece Hannah. She is 17 months old and pretty cute. Very mellow but wickedly mobile so I have to watch her every move. Soda is slightly intrigued by her and will hang out, but Whiskey is like "peace out yo. Da shorty is here and I am getting da fuck out of dodge. I be chillin' under da bed in the spare room till she exits homey." I must say though, I am enjoying her company. She answers back when I talk, which is a serious step up from the cats and I can take here anywhere. I can take her out to breakfast, shopping, errand running. She even likes the grocery store, if I give her something that she can hold while we roll (grapefruits work really well) and even better if I give her something to snack on. That's another thing, she has these chubby little toddler hands right, so they can't hold much but they can definitely pinch the shit out of you. I have these little Gerber dried apple bites that she likes, so I bring a baggie full of 'em. I pull out a couple and she grabs them (enter the pinching here) and she takes a handfull but can't hold them all, so we leave a trail of apple cubes wherever we go. I had to revisit an aisle for something that I forgot and I must have stepped on 10 of them. It made me giggle, which in turn made her giggle and I gotta tell ya...toddler laughter is a beautiful sound.
So that's that folks. Movie chatter and gushing auntie talk. That's it. I got's nothing else.
I will hopefully have more to write about tomorrow as tonight is poop class and I hope to get my grade on my evil time sucking mid-term. Which means, dear readers, that tomorrows post could be full of puppies and candy-canes or wrought with every vulgar word, and some I might make up, that I can think of.

Less blah, with a side of possible silver lining on the horizon!

What's that you say? Is Erin creeping out of her pity party for one and actually seeing a glimmer of sunlight? No way!
Part of my slight leap out of my funk came in the form of a letter addressed to me yesterday. I saw that it was from the City of Santa Rosa and being that I am a glass half empty kinda gal, I immediately assumed that it was a "thanks but no thanks" letter for the job that I applied for in the beginning of March. I hesitantly opened it, ready to commence with the doom and gloom that comes so easily for me. Wait, what does that first line say? I read it again. Congratulations. Well, I may be a chronic naysayer but I know for damn sure that denial letters don't start with congratulations. I read on. The powers that be have seen fit to invite me to participate in the next step of the hiring process. A written examination. YAY! Never have I been so happy to be invited to take a test! The test is for the Meter Specialist position that I wrote about previously. You know, the one where it said that I must be comfortable with possible tense situations? hee hee. The test is standard for a city job and I am super duper stoked. I wish April 14th was tomorrow!!
Adding to my good mood was the Tattoo convention that Rick and I attended with Joel and Taryn yesterday. Side bar- even if all we did was sit on a curb in the worst neighborhood in San Francisco and watch the crackheads jitterbug on by, it would have all been worth it to see Taryn walking upright and not wincing with every step. I tell ya, to see someone who is SO important to you walking normally and without pain really makes you appreciate what's really important in this life. Fuck the fact that I am unemployed. My cherished friend is on the road to recovery and that my friends, is simply the best thing ever.
Ok, back to the topic on hand. Tattoo convention. There were some amazing artist's and an incredible amount of freaks. I use the term freaks lovingly, of course. $22 bucks to get in seems a bit steep, until you get in there and get a load of the people. There is such a mish-mash of society present. You have your gangsta types, your punks, your rockabilly's, your pin-up/wannabe Bettie Page girls. You have mom's, dad's, business people, jocks. All brought together in one place and all for the love of body art. It's pretty awesome. I am sad to say, however, that I did not come home with any new ink. All it did was make me crazy wiggly to get some new ones. I did get some new idea's for future work (ink, not employment).
On the slightly down-side of things, I broke the toilet. The handle of the toilet to be exact. I had know idea the extent of my super strength. There was a crack and the handle went all wobbly. Thank god Rick isn't home. Wicked bummer that we only have one bathroom. I am left with a quandary. Do I attempt to fix the malfunction? What do I know about toilet handles other than the fact that went you use them, flushing happens and things are emptied. Ask me what happens after that and I could tell you in great length. All the way till the end when the water gets puts back to new. I will not bore you with talk of lift stations and force mains. I think I am going to google toilet mechanics.
Well, the sun is shining, birdies are chirping, Rick is out golfing and I am going to go to a nursery to get some flowers and do some gardening. Oh and possibly fix the goddamn toilet. More so, I am ready to start a new week. A new chapter, really. I am ready to climb out of this funk. I will find a job. Things will get better.

update!
I am all that is woman!!! A trip to Lowe's, a tri-tip sammich, a diet Pepsi and a Charleston Chew later...my toliet is fully functional and flushing just lovely!

blah

Am feeling kinda worthless today. No, this isn't a post, fishing for compliments and needing positive affirmation from my friends and loved ones, though those are always nice. I just need to vent a bit.
I need a job. I need motivation. I need to get dressed and take a fucking shower. I need to get on some kind of track. I need, I need, I need. The fact that I can't even get my ass in gear to get up and go get cigarette's is infuriating. There is a basket full of laundry that I can't even bring myself to look at. I know I need to make something for dinner, but the simple thought of getting dressed and going to the store is making me sad. I have spent the last 2 hours online looking for jobs. I can't find anything. It is such a pretty day and I can't even bring myself to enjoy that. My task for today? Water the plants and clean up the back yard. Easy enough right? The whole process will take me all of 15 minutes, yet I can't wrap my brain around getting up and getting to it. The construction gig is so far out of reach that it is off my radar now. I have applied for 2 city jobs, but have not heard a peep. I know, I know, city jobs take forever, I know this, but it's just a bit slamming to my pride. I am about 2 steps to going back to Costco, something I vowed never to even think of, but fuck..I need something!!!! I want to work. This staying home thing has gotten ever so stale and I am done. I love my cats, but even they are looking at me like "why the fuck are you always here?". I know, enjoy the time off Erin. What the fuck do you have to complain about? There are people out there that are working their asses off, just scraping by and I am sitting here in a house that I own with a brand new car and time to do with whatever I please. Poor me right? Well, here is how I feel today. I don't own this house, Rick does. The new car? Rick's. The money that puts food on the table? Rick's. It comes from the blood and sweat that Rick pours into his job every day. He gives 200% of himself everyday, to keep us afloat and I can't even get it together to do his laundry right now. He has been so good during all of this. Of course, there are little jabs here and there, but he doesn't mean it. He is the foundation of all that is us and frankly, the guilt is starting to creep in. I need to feel like I am contributing. I will never make the money that he does, I know that, but I need to feel like I am helping out. Like I am bringing something to the party. I always used to joke that I would love to sit around and eat bon-bon's all day, lounging and watching day time TV would be the life for me. Well, the bon-bons are fucking fattening and have lost their flavor and day time TV sucks. I'm over it.
On the upside, I had a pretty great weekend. There was 3 hours of studying and working on a math project with the boys for my poop class, followed up with drinking and merriment. Easter was spent, just Rick and I, randomly driving around and enjoying each other's company. A late afternoon visit with Mel and Leland capped off a nice weekend and Rick and I spent Sunday night on the couch, eating popcorn and candy and watched a movie called Stardust. It was really a cute movie and I highly recommend it. There, had to end this depressing post somewhat happy : )

6 hours

Oh, just think of all the fabulous things you can do in 6 hours. 6 hours! I can practically make it to Disneyland in 6 hours. I can make it to Tahoe and almost home in 6 hours. I can fly to Vegas, lose my house payment, get deliriously drunk and make it home in time for dinner in 6 hours. When I was working, 6 hours meant I only had 2 glorious hours till my shift was done. I can watch 3, maybe even 4 of my favorite movies (well, 2 if I chose The Godfather and Braveheart) in 6 hours.
So what is all the fuss in regards to 6 hours you ask? Where is this penchant for all that is dramatic coming from Erin? Oh I will tell you. There are words to be written about 6 hours. Not all of them excessively friendly either.
Some back story first. My shit class teacher gave us our mid term to take home, due to a scheduling conflict that was not going to let him be present during this week's class, when our mid-term was scheduled to happen. Since it was going to be open book and open note anyways, taking it home was not going to do any harm. The only clincher was that we upon finishing said test, we are to mail it to him and he is supposed to receive it no later that Thursday, the 20th.
So first, we are in kinda of a time crunch. Yes, I have to mail it only a couple towns away, but who knows how long snail mail takes these days? Friday was a no-go, I had plans. Same deal for Saturday. Sunday is the day I will work on my test and get it in the mail. Sweet, no harm no foul. All systems will be fully functional and ready to bust out a kick ass mid-term. All was well. That is until I got a message from Leland on Saturday afternoon. He said it took him 6 hours to finish the mid-term and that it was crazy hard and he was angry. Now, Leland and are about the same in regards to the class. We both feel we have a good grasp on all the topics. Insert slight panic here. I woke up, got ready, got food, ate food and finally.. took all my books and notes out to the back patio and buckled down.
Hour 1.5: I have finished 3 questions, skipped 2 and am about to freak out.
Hour 2: Commence full, hair-pulling, swearing like a sailor freak-out.
Hour 2.5: 6 questions are completed, 5 skipped and I surrender. White flag! I'm done!
Hour 2 and 35 minutes: Rick comes over, kisses my head, tells me it will all be ok.
Hour 3- 7 ciggs smoked, minus some hair, close to tears
Hour 4- Rick comes over, kisses my head, tells me it will all be ok and hands me a Venti Starbucks latte
Hour 5- half done- 5 questions skipped. Still freaking out. Panic is replaced by shear anger. Anger at my brain, anger at my idiot teacher and his stupid fucking scatttered notes. Anger gives way to full red-blooded rage.
Hour 5 and 45 minutes: am wishing every horrible disease on my teacher. Just a little Ebola. Nothing fatal. Please let him get just a touch of Entomoeba Hystolitica (amoebic disentary). I step away and have a smoke in my cool new chair.
Hour 6- done . fucking done. I can't believe the end is here. Then I knock over what's left of my latte on my completed satanic mid term packet. oh fucking well. I can still read the answers and if the teach can't read it, then he can suck my butt.

So there you have it. 1 water, 1 diet pepsi, 1 venti latte, countless cigarettes and 1beer later and I am done. 6 hours of my life that I will never get back. And you know what absolutely kills me? I mean, seriously what really chaps my hide? If things had gone how teach wanted it to, we would have taken the mid term during class, which...may I remind you, is ONLY A 3 HOUR FUCKING CLASS. I would have failed for sure.

On the upside. The vile mid term is in the mail and I think I did well. Rick said that he is SO proud of me. He said that the old Erin would have given up and never gone back to class. That's what I love about that guy folks. Never once yesterday, during any of my hissy-fits did he come over and try to calm me down by talking. He was just there with a kiss or a hug or a coffee. It was awesome!

On the up upside. Today is St. Patrick's Day, one of my favorite days. An Irish Car Bomb and loads of Guinness is just what the Dr. ordered. I am going to spend the next 6 hours more wisely. Downtown Petaluma with my friends, drinking and having a laugh.

If you are feeling a touch of the Irish and go out, be safe and don't drink and drive. Have lots of Guinness or green beer and enjoy the fact that you didn't have to take a fucking 6 hour mid term.

'Éirinn go Brágh'!!!!!!

Wednesday's are super duper

Dude, I am annoying myself to the point of madness today. I am sitting here watching Disturbia for the 100th time. I'm not sure why I can't get enough of this movie. I have an inkling that I might enjoy watching Shia LeBouf a little too much. I may have to add him to my list of movie star crushes. He is a little cutie. Anyways, the house is clean, laundry is done and I am bored out of my gourd. I did apply for 2 jobs today. One is a Meter Specialist position for the City of Santa Rosa. Basically, it's walking around and reading meters to determine water usage. What caught my eye is a line that said "Communicating verbally face to face with customers, sometimes in tense situations", it totally cracked my ass up. Why tense I wonder? I've never been pissed of at a meter reader. Anyways, it seems like a good gig.. we shall see if they contact me. I did finally hear from the recruiter about the construction gig I mentioned long long ago. She said that the dude in charge wants to interview me, but wants to also interview someone with prior construction company experience. She told him that he doesn't need to interview anyone else, that he will want to hire me regardless, but he said find someone else to compare me too and that is the only way he will conduct said interview. She then said that she will have to find someone else to interview in addition to me. That was back on the 6th of March, so we shall see if she finds someone. Seriously though, like I can't fucking learn the construction industry? I didn't know anything about wine when I left Costco to go to Korbel and in 3 years I was running a million dollar a year department. I had NO CLUE about mortgages and was kicking ass and taking names at the HC tech support gig well above my projected training schedule. I feel like grabbing his noggin, putting him in a head lock and screaming. I CAN LEARN THE FUCKING BUSINESS,YOU DOUCHE! But I wont, cuz then I will be bored in jail, biding my time till I get bought by a bull dyke for a carton of smokes.
Speaking of smokes, I ran out of them this morning and had to drag my bootie out to get some. Double Yuck. While I was out, I thought it would be the a good idea to get some lunch. A burrito sounded lovely. Hey, wait a minute, there is a burrito shop right next to the cigarette place! How fortuitous!! Now, I know that both these places are right across the street from the high school, so I get dressed (seriously, I was going to go in my Pj's, but though better of it) and in my head I am trying to remember when lunch time is. Well, I went about 2 minutes before the youth of Rohnert Park descended upon the strip mall. I managed to get the smokes and the burrito right as the parking lot was filling up, and let me tell you..those little fuckers are wicked annoying and don't like to get out of the way of a moving vehicle. It took me a whole minute just to back out of the parking space, then another 3 to navigate my exit.
Now I am back, sitting on the couch, Soda in lap and burrito safely ensconced in my belly.
I think I might be in dire need of some Clariton D. I feel like poop. Not total bed ridden poop, just sinus headache and ever so slightly stuffed nose poop. Maybe a shower will help. Oh, shower then a beer. Now that sounds like a prescription to feel better!

Jaeger bombs

Jaeger bombs are deceptive little bastards in a glass. It's a cocktail, yes, and the Red Bull should provide you with an inkling that there may be an excess of energy coming your way, but man..3 or 4 later and the next time you look at a clock it's 5:00 AM, peeps are dropping off like flies and you are still raring to go. I can't say enough good about them. They are delightfully tasty and they provide you with the power to stay up to the wee hours of morning. The only bad thing about them that I can think of stems from a series of events that led our good buddy Joel not to be able to partake in them anymore. Let's just say, for humor's sake, Jaeger bombs make him wicked twitchy. Hee hee. The funny thing about the J-bombs is that separately, I do not enjoy Jaeger OR Red Bull. But together, it is the drink of the gods. Or the drink of the godless. Depends on how you see things.
Rick's birthday was this past weekend. He didn't want a huge deal, so a few buddies came over to play Rockband on the Xbox and imbibe in some alcohol. It was fun. We had a fire pit going, but ran out of Duraflames, so I am sorry to report that 4 old wood IKEA chairs met their untimely death on Saturday night. They were good chairs, many a fine ass has sat upon those chairs over the years. May they rest in peace.

That's all I have today. Not much to report in the exciting world of Erin.

Rick's got a new love in his life

No, it's not some big boobied trashy blonde contortionist that is a poker champ with a side business as a porno star and all fertile and whatnot...
It's the above: a 2008 Lexus IS 250 and our brand new car.
We couldn't have our fancy pants Assisitant Vice President of Talent Aquisitions rolling into Mill Valley in a Ford Focus, now could we? He is now officially a yuppie, folks.

slightly disgruntled again

Here I sit, blogging. It's Tuesday morning. No job interview yet. What's the deal with peeps not calling me when they say they will call me? Am I some "do not call" pariah? The recruiter was supposed to set me up for an interview with the construction gig I mentioned awhile back. So far, nothing. Turns out, the dude was out of town and she got the dates mixed up (she told me this last Thursday, in a message on my answer machine). She will talk to him when he gets back, which I thought she said would be yesterday. So far, no word. I am sad. I am not sad that I didn't take the tech support gig. I am happy about that. All signs point to "good move Erin". I just wish I could get an interview set up with this construction company. It sounded like something that was right up my alley. Maybe the dude had a chance to check out my resume and he didn't like it. Who knows. I am back to the drawing board, I guess. Time to start looking at craigslist and whatnot. I am getting complacent and I do not like the way that feels. I like to work. I want to work, I really really do.
Rick said find a job, get a plan together or get pregnant. YIKES! He is consumed with full on baby fever. I get it, his birthday is this weekend and it weighs heavier on his mind when birthday time rolls around. He wants to be a dad. He wants 2 kids, 3 years apart and at this point...it's not looking so good. I think he is frustrated because he wants to be a young dad. He doesn't want to be the old guy that isn't going to be around to see his grandkids. I guess I just worry that I am not going to be a good mother. Another low point is I don't wanna get fat. Well, fatter then I already am, that is.
AARRGGGG. I envy the people who have things figured out from the get go. The few that go to college and into the jobs they want. The ones that don't get stuck in a weird jobless limbo and wait to start a family till their slightly old-ish and their shit is not working. Ha, that last line made me giggle a bit. Sometimes I crack myself up.
I need to get back to my funny self. I worry to much these days. I guess nothing funny has happened lately.
I watched my nephews get the shiz-nit beat out of them this past weekend playing lacrosse. Well, Jimmy did. The older boys are considerably rougher than the 10 year olds. Jimmy did a great job though. He is captain of the team and was really getting in there and getting dirty. My little buddy. when did he get so grown up? He will be 18 next month and graduating high school soon after. *sigh* I remember the little boy that couldn't pronounce my name, so he called me Nernie. Who would argue with me to no end (dude, I was 15 when he was born, I had no idea how to talk to toddlers) and who loved to go to Burger King. He so adult now, but he still tells his Aunt Erin that he loves her and gives her hugs and kisses, which is all I can ever ask for. Jake, will be 11 tomorrow, which is nuts. I was in the delivery room when he was born and let me tell you..that was the best birth control ever. Birthing is a gross process. Lots of fluids and gooey stuff. Jake is a trip and I love him to death too.
Well then, I think I will shower and start my day. Maybe do some ironing and pick up the house.
woo-hoo.

Hospital's

Just saying the word hospital gives me the wiggins. I have been poked and prodded and operated on so many times and even though it has been awhile since my last surgery, walking through those doors brings me right back. It's like a time warp. In a matter of seconds, I am right back in that backless gown, ass hanging out, IV in arm and butterflies in my stomach. Every worse case scenario flashing through my mind. Know what's worse than your average garden variety hospital?? A super duper ghetto Oakland hospital!! I went with Taryn and Joel the day that Miss Taryn had her back surgery and let me tell you, that hospital was somethin' else. I won't tell the whole story, but I will give you a snippet to chew on.
We arrive at the hospital, which is located in a less than savory part of town. Admitting is done and we are taken to a room for pre-op. Actually, I wouldn't call it a room. I will call it a "slightly larger than a crack house bathroom, but not as clean as one" type of room. First thing I notice..carpet. Why the fuck would you have carpet in a hospital? My thoughts are immediately drawn to every virus, bacteria and pathogen we have talked about in poop class and how that lovely indoor/outdoor carpet would house them just swimmingly. Secondly, the chair that poor Taryn has to sit on is all kinds of busted. First off, it looks like it was from a dentist's office. From the 50's. Secondly, it is broken. Every time she moves it makes the horrible noise and shakes, like it is just going to fall to pieces right there. What's worse is that it did it while the nurse was in there and she just dismissed it. Now, i'm not a nurse, nor am I a medical professional in any sense, but the bitch knew Taryn was in there for back surgery. Would it have been to much for her fat ass (and she was a biggun folks, and red to boot. she did not look healthy, but I digress) to say "hey, this poor girl is in for back surgery, so that MUST mean that her back is fucked up and she may quite possibly be uncomfortable and me, being a nurse and in a profession to fucking help people, I think it would be a good idea to get this girl and nice, non-broken chair." Yeah that must have been too much for her 500 plus pound self to comprehend. She just went on asking her questions and writing her notes. The second thing I notice about this stellar, top of the line room is the garbage can. Now, it's just a regular garbage can, which is problem numero uno. It is also badly in need of emptying. Not only is it a regular, non covered garbage can that is in need of emptying, it is fucking so full that it is overflowing!!! There is IV tubing hanging out of it and touching the floor! Again, not in the medical industry, but one assumes that said IV has been used. I mean, why would they throw away a new, non-used sterile IV hmmmmm??? Virus, bacteria and pathogen's oh my! By now, I am trying to keep myself calm and not go absolutely ape-shit postal for Taryn's sake. In addition, I am also ignoring the impulse to grab her and take her to a beter a better hospital, say a big "fuck you" to Kaiser and pay for the surgery myself : ) So then nurse Fatty Mc Fatterson takes Taryn's temperature. She is sitting off to the side of the jacked-up chair. When she is done, she then proceeds to hold the thermometer up and clicks the button to release the sterile cap (fuck, at least they used one of those, on must be thankful for small favors!!!) which she then sends the used...and I stress the word USED, cap flying towards to the overflowing garbage, banks it off the wall (of the wall. off the fucking wall people!) and into the trash. Being that I am such an astute person, I can only assume that this room has been used before. Call it intuition or chalk it up my incredible investigative skills, but that garbage didn't get full on it's own!! I am so beside myself and in shock that she did this, all I can think to say is "nice shot". So many health violations there, so little time.
In the end, the operation was a success and Taryn is safely home, where I know for a fact, it's a sterile environment : ) All I could really ask for is that she is safe,healthy, and well, straightened out. I know she is safe and healthy. The straightened out part will happen in time, hopefully. All comedy aside, I hope she ends up good as new. Nobody likes to see the people they love in pain, ya know?
That's about it for today. It's noon and I am still in my jammies. I need to shower, eat, clean and study. Not necessarily in that order.

My wicked smart brother

I love my big brother. I really really do. Big bro Chris came over yesterday to help Leland and I study. I wasn't looking forward to it at first cuz I was up late and was a bit hungover, but we needed to do it, so we did. We had been given 2 new math formula's for our poop class that were crazy. Chris explained everything and gave us problem's to work out. Then he would check our answers. Here is an example of the crazyness that is the math for class.
So you have these trickling filters in a plant, which is the beginning of the biological part of treating wastewater. What you have to find out is the organic loading in pounds BOD/day/thousand cubic feet for a circular trickling filter. BOD is the Biochemical Oxygen Demand. What you first have to figure is the specs. The diameter of the filter is 133 feet squared with a media depth of 6 feet, the primary effluent flow is 2.5 MGD (millions of gallons per day) with a BOD of 200 mg/L. First you multiply the 2.5 MGD x the 200 mg/L BOD x the weight of water (which is 8.34) write that number down- then you multiply the diameter squared x .785 x the depth (6ft), then you divide that number by 1000. Draw a line under the first number you wrote down and write your second number down. The top number represents the amount of BOD and the bottom number represents the volume of media. Now you divide the volume of media by the amount of BOD and you are left with 50lbs /day/thous.cubic feet. There ya go. Throughly confused? That is the shit (no pun intended. wait a minute, maybe there is a pun intended. puns are fucking funny) that I am dealing with folks. The above formula is something that I will have to figure out during the operator test multiple times. I actually have to memorize the above formula and so far, 4 others like it. This is something that my little Erin brain is going to have to nail. It's daunting, really, but my brother is such a huge help that I think I will be ok. Just have to study and not get flustered. It's also a huge plus going through this with Leland. We study together every week and it's awesome to have someone who is going through the same frustrations and worries. Also, Dave and Larry are great. Chris has been doing this for 10 years, but to talk to him, you get the feeling that he has been doing it his whole life. It is just so natural for him. I have always been proud of my brother. Back when he was serving in the army there was a dangerous mission to Panama where his company was featured on the news as the first guys jumping in. The LA Riots when he was in the Guard. Now, an Operator 5 for a huge wastewater plant. I guess I am just in awe of him. Wicked smart, I tell ya.

That's all I gots for today. Still jobless, but hopefully I will have an interview this week. Taryn gets her back surgery tomorrow, so if everyone could think good thoughts for her, that would be awesome.
Be well everyone : )

Oh god

Oh my fucking god people. I just called the tech support gig and told them I am not taking the job.
Rick's recruiter friend couldn't get me an interview until next Wednesday, which posed a slight problem being that I was supposed to start on Monday. I decided that I would rather take a chance on the office job. I am freaking out, but in a good way. I feel like I am finally taking control of my situation. Rick told me it was a decision I had to make on my own, no advice was he going to give.
At first, I was irritated. He always gives me advice. He is my own personal tabernacle of recruiting and job knowledge. How could he leaving me hanging out on that proverbial limb by myself??
After shaking off the cobwebs of sleep, mucho cups of coffee and much thinking, I came to the decision on my own and it feels pretty good. There is no guarantee that this construction/office job will work out, it's just an interview, but I feel like I am moving in the right direction.
That's about all I have right now : )

In a mood

I am in a mood today kids and I fear that it is not a good one. For one thing, I am freezing my ass off. Why am I freezing my ass off you ask? Cuz my stupid self is sitting outside, smoking and blogging. I was going to blog inside, where it is toasty, but I really wanted to smoke..so here I am.
You should see me, sweatshirt with hood on and tied tightly around my neck, pj bottoms tucked into rain boots. It honestly doesn't get any sexier. My rain boots are wicked cute though, so I guess I have that going for me. The weather reports say we are going to get a smack down storm this weekend. Sweet. Love those rainstorms. We just haven't had enough rain this year. I think we need it, so I shouldn't be bitching, but I am in a bitching kinda mood. I also feel it necessary to bitch about my breakfast. Oatmeal. I cooked it perfectly but put too much brown sugar in it and now my stomach hurts. Also, I didn't drink enough coffee this morning. I was going to make another pot, but I always make coffee before class and I really don't need to be caffeinated for 13 hours straight. I also don't have anything for lunch and I really don't want to go get something. What I need to do is shower and go to the store. A hot shower sounds nice right now.
I guess what is adding to my bad mood is my current job situation. I am really regretting my descision to take this job. To add insult to injury, a recruiter friend of Rick's has called with another job option that sounds way better. My only quandary is that I am supposed to start my new gig on Monday. The recruiter is trying to get me an interview with this construction company in Marin tomorrow. It's an office job, which sounds kinda cool. Rick says that I need to wait till after the interview (if she can get me one) to see if it sounds like a lock. He is right about that. He is the recruiting smartypants after all. It just sucks that I have found something that I think I can be good at (the wastewater poopy job) and now it's a waiting game. In addition to waiting, it's also not a guarantee that I will get hired. I need to finish the class and take the test. Then, I have to see if I get hired and that can take a long time. I need to have a job while all that is going on and I just don't feel like the tech support gig is where I should be. Rick says that I always do a major freak out before I take a new job, but this just feels different. Not so much a freak out as it is just plain foreboding. A sense of doom if you will. I'm not nervous or stressed about it, just blah.
I am also irritated that with all this time off, not once have I even attempted to exercise. It has not even crossed my mind, which is wicked lame. I guess the force is strong with my couch and laptop. Unfortunately, as happy as the couch makes me, it sure hasn't helped with my squishy ass. Thankfully, I haven't been eating bad so I have not been gaining weight. I have stayed at my current pre-laid off fatness. Not any fatter, but not any thinner.
Methinks it is time for that shower now.

Back to Reality

Vegas is fabulous. In fact, it's better than fabulous. There just isn't an adjective that quite describes Vegas properly. We had a really great time. We got to Vegas Friday night, late. We decided to stay at our hotel, find a bar and maybe play some poker. We found a bar in one of the restaurants. We sit down, feed the poker machines and start chatting up the bartender. This lady is amazing. She is a total throwback. She has been a bartender all her life, all over the country. We pegged her age at mid 60's, but just looking at her, you could tell that she was a bombshell in her day. We are talking a beauty that you just don't encounter every day. She just had a look about her. She loved us. She said that we were the first nice people she has had in awhile. She hooked us up all weekend. We also went and saw a Cirque Du Soleil at the MGM, called KA. It was fucking phenomenal. Visually gorgeous. I wont go into it, cuz whatever I say is not going to do it any justice. KA was really the only plans we had . We kinda just wanted to fly by the seat of our pants. We went and gambled everywhere. I have a newfound love for Roulette. Fuck, I just love gambling in general. I usually prefer Blackjack, but the tables were SO packed. We hunkered down at Harrah's and found a Roulette table that we liked. The dealers were awesome. We also played Blackjack at O'sheas. I guess you can say that we spent most of our gambling time at the older, slightly sleazier places. I find that the dealers and the people are just more enjoyable. Dude, O'sheas has beer pong people. Sure the casino smells slightly of puke, but beer pong, hello!!!! There needs to be a group trip to Vegas so we can play beer pong.
It is looking like my days of being unemployed are seriously numbered. I got offered and took the tech support job for the winery software. I am not so enthused. It's not that I don't want to work. I like to work. I have been enjoying my times as unemployed house bitch, though. I just dont want to do customer service. I am really enjoying my poop class and really want to move forward with that. The only problem is that there is no guarantee that I will get a job in that field and being that it is a county job, it could take months to find one. I guess I should look at this current job as just something to do until the poop thing matriculates. I think I am a wee bit depressed about taking it. It just doesn't feel right. *sigh*

VIVA LAS VEGAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nuff 'said. See y'all back here on Tuesday. Well, that is if I haven't caused any serious brain damage from all the drinking and smoking and gambling I plan on doing : )

un-fucking-believeable

dude. I had to write about this. First off, I have no idea how anorexics can make themselves throw up. Really, it's disgusting and ridiculously hard to do. Plus, there is a lot of slobber involved. Why you ask? Get ready, this is a good one.

So, I'm in bed and my stomach starts a'rumblin'. I get up and decide that I want pancakes. I make up the batter, get my homemade syrup out of the fridge so it can warm up and turn the griddle on. So far so good. I am super excited to be having pancakes. I make 2 gloriously huge cakes, nice and fluffy. I butter them up, grab the syrup and my cup of coffee, head to the couch to finish Notting Hill and eat my utterly delightful breakfast. About half way through, I spear a square of pancake and notice something weird. There is a greenish slime on the square!!! Now, there was nothing green about the batter. The milk and eggs were fresh. When mixing it up I noticed nothing out of the ordinary. So I freak out. Completely. I go to the kitchen and look in the batter. No floaters of anything alien. I take out my syrup container and notice in the top, there looks like a bit of what I saw on the pancake, but I can't tell. The syrup isnt even old. I mean, for fuck sakes, all it is sugar, water and maple extract!! More freaking out. Now I am thinking that I have ingested some crazy bacteria/pathogen that is going to kill me. I run to the bathroom and spend the next 10 minutes with my finger down my throat, trying to make myself throw up. I need to get the pancakes out! Well, without trying to make y'all barf, I managed to get some of it out, but I know there are still some partially digested pancakes in my belly. So I say this. Consider it a public service announcement if you will, should I end up in the hospital poisoned by some unknown alien slime. I have put a sample of the slime and pancake in the fridge. As is the syrup container. I want to keep it in case it is needed for testing to determine what medical action needs to be taken. Pay attention folks, you could be accomplices to saving my life : ) I blame my new found germ phobia on my poop class. What if it is some crazy mutant sugar based algae that is lethal??? God, I hope I don't get some kind of food poisoning. ok. I am a fruitcake and might be overreacting a bit. Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, I am hungry again.


UPDATE!!!
Ok, it has been 3 hours since the Revenge of the Green Slime. No projectile vomiting, no dizziness or fever, no stomach cramps, I'm not growing a new head and there are no signs of gangrene. I think it might be safe to say that I did not ingest the mysterious slime. I just polished off a sammich from Port O' Subs and it seems to be sitting in my stomach well. I am currently having a ciggarette and that seems to be going ok as well. Don't think I am throwing that sample away though. It is still in the fridge. I will post an update before I leave for class. That is, if I am alive and well and not praying to the porcelain gods

UPDATE #2!!
I am back from class. No exorcist reenactments. No explosive diarrhea. Nada. I am thinking that I must have avoided eating the slime, somehow..I have no clue. I was hoovering those fucking pancakes. Why I chose to look down right as the gook covered confection was hanging off my fork...I will never know : )

Happy fuckin' Valentines Day

Yes, it's fucking early. Yes, it's Valentine's day. Yes, my husband is kind of a douchebag. I am annoyed. I normally wouldn't bitch about him on my blog, but it is 7:30, I'm annoyed and wide awake and I am watching Notting Hill for the 5 billionth time. I know he is sick (bad cold folks, not the end of the world) and he is prone to run on the cranky side when he is sick. He was also running late this morning (no fault of mine, I kept trying to get him out of bed, knowing he was going to be late). So he is almost ready to go, I get up and make sure he takes a vitamin C drink with him and you know, wish him happy fucking 7 year anniversary and such. I even showed him the card I got him MONTHS ago for today, but I hadn't signed it yet, but it was such a cool card, I thought I would show him early. Maybe it would perk him up. It was one of those cards that plays music when you open it. It played Cash's "I walk the line". For the couple of people who read my blog and were not at my wedding, instead of the traditional wedding song, I walked down the aisle to I walk the Line. I got a slight reaction out of him, but he was in his own world. Then he was leaving, he must of realized that he was being a douche, cuz he came back in the kitchen and kissed me on the cheek. I get that he is dying (NOT) and running late, but fuck. It's not like I was expecting pomp and circumstance ya know? we are going to Vegas and whatnot, but I guess I expected maybe a hug or something a little more "hey, I love you, happy 7 years!! Woo-hoo!!". S0 here I sit, blogging and stewing. I am excited for Vegas though. Hopefully princess will be feeling better. Hell, the amount of drinking and smoking I plan on doing is probably going to send me back into sickville. With my luck I will get back from Vegas and come down with some weird new hybrid super sick. Something like Tuberculosis and the Bird Flu combined. Oh, with a little amoebic dysentery mixed in. Wow, that escalated quickly. Sorry. It's Thursday, poop class day, and I guess I am still thinking of the pathogens we learned last week : )
Well friends, I hope you all have a great day. Don't buy your loved one roses or chocolate. Be different. Maybe a bunch of Gerber Daisey's or even a baked potato. Maybe you don't buy them anything. You should show your love year round. Not just on Valentines day : ) But in the spirit of V-day, I am sending you all hugs and kisses anyways! XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Ugh

Good Morning again from the Nelson bed. Still warm, still cozy..still full of phlegm. I ask you, what is worse than being sick 2 days before you leave for Vegas? Rick getting sick two days before we leave for Vegas. I got it on Sunday and am feeling better. The only good thing is that if he got what got, then he will feel really bad today, better tomorrow and by Friday he'll just have an irritating cough. It just sucks ass. We never take long weekends anymore because he works so much.. For our first year anniversary, we ended up going to the Winchester Mystery House and then on to Monterey. We never made plans or reservations, we just got in the car and picked a direction. It was awesome and we always had a fun little adventure. But then life happens and things get busy and you can't break away as often. Now, our 7 year anniversary falls on a nice 3 day weekend. We decide to make plans. We actually make reservations. Vegas baby, Vegas. Now we are both fucking sick. Maybe it's because we fucked with the spontaneity of the whole adventurous weekend thing. Who knows. Hopefully he will be ok. If not, we will just have to do Vegas all snuffly and coughing. Then again, I can be functional when I am sick. Rick, let's just say...uh, hmmm.well, yup, no way to put it delicately... he reverts back to childhood. There, I said it. He is a fucking miserable 5 year old when he is sick : ) He was super cranky this morning, but I am going to give him a wide berth on this one. I think he is just furious that he is sick this close to Vegas. Nothing we can do right?
I need to train the cats to get me coffee. Seriously, this whole looking cute and sleeping on me is cool and all, but they need to start earning their keep. It so fucking cold in my house right now. I just don't want to get up, but I really really really want more coffee. So, do I get up, make a mad naked dash to the kitchen, refill and run back to bed? OR. do I get up, get dressed..walk calmly to the kitchen, get a refill, maybe make some breakfast and go kick it on the couch for a few? This is a big decision. What to do, what to do.

a general state of disgruntlement

disgruntledness was what I first used for the title of this lovely blog, until I realized that I don't even think that it's a word. My fears were made true when that stupid little red squiggly line appeared under it. Actually, its a red dotted line, but that's not the point. Anyways, I chose disgruntlement from that handy little drop down of suggestions. Personally, I think disgruntledness sounds better than disgruntlement, even if it's not a word. Regardless of the word I use, the root is disgruntled and that is most definitely what I am right now.
Let me take you thru a series of events that has led to my current foul mood.
First event, Rick decides that since there is a long weekend coming up, we should get out of town. Sweet, I say. Long story short, we are going to Las Vegas this Friday. This is not a bad thing and is not why I am in a bad mood, but be patient, I will get there. Moving right on to the next event.. This is a good one.
There is a party happening, girls only, where the theme is wear your wedding dress or bridesmaid's dress. I responded as a yes to said party. I know the girl throwing it and a few others, but I don't know them all that well. Mel was on the fence, but got a bad cold, so she couldn't go. Carol called and we decided that we would go together. I planned on wearing what I wore in Krisztina's wedding and Carol bought a dress. I spend an hour and a half straightening my hair, another 30 minutes perfecting my make-up and getting all dolled up. I am also going to mention that I was starting to feel a cold coming on. Carol and I were both dressed up fabulously. She picks me up and we are on our way. We had to call the host for the address and as we pulled up in the driveway, she (the host) opened the door. The first thing Carol and I noticed was that the host was not in costume.In fact, she was in sweats. I told Carol to call her back and ask why she wasn't dressed and to ask if anyone else in attendance was dressed. I guess she wore her wedding dress for an hour, then took it off and so far, nobody was really dressed. I said there is no fucking way I am walking in there if nobody was dressed. I was wearing a fucking fancy ass strapless black dress and 4 1/4 inch stilettos for christ sakes! Carol felt the same way and she told the host that we were going to go home and change and we would come back. I also failed to mention that Leland, Phil and Krisztina and Blake had come over to play Rock Band with Rick. Carol and I walk in and I am fired up. Who throws a fucking theme party and then doesn't even dress up?? I can't even begin to describe how unbelievably irritated I was. I even made a kick ass fruit platter to bring. Arrg!! Just thinking about it riles me up again!
Carol and I change then decide to have a cocktail before we go back to the party. Well, that cocktail turned into 2 , then 3 then 4 and we never made it back to the party..heehee. We were perfectly content to drink here and chill, which was wicked fun. The cool thing was that we probably had more fun here anyways than we would have had at the theme party that really wasn't a theme party. .
The catalyst for my foul mood you ask? I AM FUCKING SICK. I felt like ass last night and after 14 hours sleep, I woke up feeling like death warmed over. Figures right? Since I'm going to Vegas at the end of the week, it totally fucking figures that I would get sick now. God, I am so pissed. Seriously, if I can't beat this shit by Friday, then I am going to be one bitter bitch.
I feel so crappy, that I haven't even smoked today. Not a one!!!
*sigh* I got nothing else. I feel like going back to bed.
In case I don't blog for a couple days, I would like all who read this to think good thoughts for Miss Taryn, who is getting her back operated on this week. We know she will be fine, but there is never anything wrong with people sending good vibes : )

Brain worms and paging Dr. Tuck-Nelson

This morning, this blog is coming to you from the Nelson bed. Why have I not thought of blogging from bed before? Do you realize how delightful this is? Warm and all snuggled under the covers. I have coffee within easy reach, stupid movie on the TV for some background noise, Soda on my feet and Whiskey by my side. Unemployment has its perks ; )
Last night, I saw a picture of what a brain looks like when it has been infected with tapeworms. Yucky, no bueno and most definitely not cute. Apparently, this is a risk if you ingest raw pork. My teacher said that though tapeworms generally play house in your gut, when they get into unfamiliar territory (ex..a human) there is a possibility that they can get lost and could end up in your brain. Fun huh? Last weeks class was heavy biology and last night's class was heavy Microbiology. Dude. Ask me anything about Bacteria, virus, Algae, Fungi, Protozoa and Pathogens. Seriously, I feel like I am one test away from being a doctor. I do like this class and I think I will pass it, but sometimes I just feel....well, for lack of a better term, like such a girl. I know what you are thinking, Erin...you ARE a girl, it would make sense for you to feel like one.
It's not like that. There just so much talk of mechanics and tools and other stuff I just don't know about. I guess it really has nothing to do with being a girl, but everything to do with the work I have done. I really have had no need to use tools and such, but I wish I would have tried to learn more about it. Next time Leland comes over to fix or build something, I am going to really pay attention : )
I feel like my posts as of late are lacking. I'm actually getting board when re-reading them to look for spelling mistakes. Ah well, sometimes life is boring eh? I mean, what is the true point of a blog but to write and get your feelings and all that sensitive shit out there right? I guess it can't always be witty and charming, cuz sometimes life just isn't.

A 2 day bender

Christ on a crutch, bender's are phenomenal. What's more fun than your average garden variety weekend or vacation bender??? Good question. A completely unprecedented surprise Sunday thru Monday bender!!!
Sunday started with a Superbowl shindig at our place. I was originally opposed to hosting, being that I hate football...but we do have a great house and a fabulous set-up for it. We configured our million piece sectional couch into 2 rows, movie theater style. Plenty of places for everyone to be all comfy and cozy. It was fucking fantastic. I really didn't plan on drinking as much as I did, but when I realized that I was already 3 Miller High Life's in before the game even started...I figured that it was on. The unemployment factor kicked in. I didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not? There was a stupid amount of beer and food. Everyone was in good spirits and ready to enjoy the day. We had squares to buy and commercial bingo was in effect. I think I watched the 1st quarter and the last 5 minutes of the game. The rest of the time I just drank and enjoyed everyone. Here's the thing...usually Superbowl is a drinking time but people have to work the next day, so it wraps up early and there may be some buzzy peeps, but nothing out of control. Not this time. Everyone was in it to win it. Around half time I looked around and realized that a good portion of the attendee's were, indeed, very inebriated. It was awesome! Rock Band came out and the drunk ones played until the wee hours of morning. I think I must have at least cleared a 12 pack. Rick and some of the boys were even doing shots of whiskey. It was a crazy day/night and it was good times had by all. The next morning....YIKES. Rick had to get up at 6:00 am to get ready for work. As I walked down the hall, after stumbling sideways multiple times and banging into the walls like a pinball, it became apparent that I was in for a smashing hangover. As soon as my ass sobered up that is. I was still hammered. When Rick begrudgingly left for work, I was left to my own devices on the still theater style couch, giggling uncontrollably because I had such a great time the previous night. That lasted about an hour before I realized that I had to get ready for my second interview! FUCK!!!! The drive to Napa sucked my butt. I was wicked shaky and my internal temperature control was skewed. First I was cold, then stiflingly hot.My stomach was in a constant state of revolt as I tried to choke down a PB & J sandwhich. I was moving slow. No wait, not just slow, but sloooooooooooooooooow. My head felt like little imps were in there trying to rearrange my grey matter. Even the gallon of coffee and the multiple ciggys were not helping. Train wreck, was I. When the interview was over, I headed straight to my beloved Burger King for some much needed hangover food. Now, we shall fast forward to Monday evening.
There I was, front seat of my dad's Durango, (dad driving of course). Mel, Leland, Krisztina and Rick all piled in the back heading to San Francisco. Dad is known as Designated Driver of the Party Van, a title bestowed upon him when he decided to drive his daughter and all her friends out to the bars for my 21st birthday. He truly is a saint. But back to the story at hand. We had tickets to see one of my all time favorite bands, Social Distortion. All parties involved were excited. We got to The Fillmore (a super fabulous place to see a show, by the way) a bit early so we decided to hit up a bar. Hair of the dog right? A couple Vodka Collin's later and I was back to myself. Everyone was perked up and ready to watch a kick ass show. And kick ass it was, my friends. I am in awe. They opened with Uninvited Feelings, an excellent choice. They did it acoustic, which was ok, though I prefer it in it's true bad ass form. The next 2 songs were acoustic as well, which was kinda getting me down. I didn't plan on seeing Social D unplugged. I went to the bar to get more drinks. As I stood, waiting..there it was. The fourth song was in true Social D fashion. I grabbed my drinks and headed back to the floor. While I was gone, the mosh pit has positioned itself right in front of us. At first, I was not pleased. Then I noticed that the 3 boys directly in front of me were standing up ramrod straight, feet planted, arms crossed and ready to bounce those little moshers on their asses. Those 3 guys were amazing. I got pushed every once in awhile, when a slippery little sucker got too close, but it was all good. At the end, I hugged all 3 and kissed their cheeks, thanking them for being my wall and letting me enjoy a truly fabulous show. Mike Ness, the hottie lead singer is getting up there in years, so I was slightly worried that after touring for so long and this being their last show, that his voice was going to be fucked. Not so. He sounded better than ever. He is most definitely moved up closer to the top of my "list".
Upon exiting the Fillmore, we walked to the car, all of us but my dad were hammered. It was a fun ride home, well..to be honest,I can't really say that cuz my drunk ass passed the fuck out. hee hee.
It was a beautiful end to a truly spectacular bender.